A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:Hi !I have been chatting with a Guy from February 2008 onwards, Initially he was trying to chat with me about sex... but I changed his views/ideas completely and I told him that I am only interested in a real good guy... who will be able to give me the real Love and should be true to me.. he has agreed for that and he never spoke deeply about sex... but started expressing his feelings on love... so, we used to chat like 2 good friends madly in love...He used to give good suggestions for my problems... but during the first week of this month... I asked him for his contact number (He is a foreigner) which he did not give it to me... he was very reluctant..He asked me for my contact number... which I promptly gave him... he informed me that he will call be...but he never called me once also...So again I asked for his contact number while chatting he informed me that his cell phone belongs to his office and he cannot give me his contact number..I asked him if he has any other personal number.. he denied having one... I am very worried why doesn't he give me his contact number.. and why he doesn't call me at all... He is good to me only online..what should I do... whether I should continue to chat with him... or stop it totally... please suggest..Right Now... I did not go online for sometime..But I always think of him... it is disturbing me quite a lot...Please keep my identity as confidential..Also please intimate me.. when you answer my mail please...Thanks and RegardsSheeba Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Ask oldersister  +, writes (21 June 2008):
 "but I changed his views/ideas completely and I told him that I am only interested in a real good guy"- I'm sorry but it doesn't work that way. You continuing to talk to a guy that approaches your relationship from a sexual standpoint doesn't change his mentality, it just lets him know what to say and what not to say to you to hook you in. Also, he talks about love and you haven't even met him or talked to him? You continuing to invest your time and emotions in a guy that won't even give you a phone number is not prudent and this also lets him know that he doesn't have to do much to keep you stringing along. Stop talking to him and be smarter about protecting yourself in the future.
A
female
reader, scrazy  + ♥, writes (21 June 2008):
 He has another woman.You're just his online fling on the side so he can cheat without it really seeming like cheating- After all, he's only proposing that you two get together and have sex, not actually going out and doing it.But if you ever suggest you two meet up, he's going to hop right on the bandwagon to have sex with you.Leave him alone, he's slime.
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A
female
reader, Country Woman  + ♥, writes (21 June 2008):
 Hi sorry to say this but the guy is probably not genuine at all as any one who is genuine would give you his contact details and certainly from Feb to now you should know one another well enough.
Don't give him any more personal info i.e. address or full name or anything as he could be someone who is at a cyber cafe and who is building up to asking you for cash, what does he describe himself as? Is he someone who works for a charity and constantly travels abroad? If so, he has probably got several women he chats to and eventually he will build up to asking you to transfer an amount of cash via some cash transfer place as it is for a doctors payment or something as he has hurt himself badly and his credit card won't work in that country, be very very wary.
I once fell into the trap of thinking I was chatting to someone legitimate only to find out that once money was mentioned I withdrew straight away and this person's true colours were shown.
Not long ago there was a programme on the TV in the UK saying about these African men whose day to day job is to go to cyber cafe's and get talking to females who are vunerable or say they are in business etc and then they wait and ask for money, it is a total scam.
However, don't be put off completely just move on and start talking to someone else, if the photos are too good be wary as they normally take model photos and say that is them.
Get contact details and if they won't say who they are or give you a home number or even a mobile number and tell you all about themselves then back off.
I have also known people who have met the love of their lives online and have married and have children and are very happy so there is goodness to. One of them is my neighbour up the road so it is real as well. Just be careful and if you ever meet someone make sure it is in a public place and tell someone where you are going so that you have a trail of your whereabouts or get them to sit in a coffee shop and watch what happens so you are never alone. You could even get a friend to ring you a little while into your meeting to say are you OK or do you want to get away from this meeting so you have the perfect excuse.
Take care and here any time OK.
BFN
Country Woman
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A
female
reader, DiovanLestat +, writes (21 June 2008):
 Hi anonymous,
Sorry I didn't understand the end, and I hope you are able to recieve this mail. The man you spoke about only wants sex, he is unable to give out his number because he already has a woman who he lives with. He's kind online, because he still hopes that he can get some sex. He's not nice, he's not kind, he likes using people and he's a dishonest cheat. I suggest you have no further contact with him just to be safe.
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