New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login226360 questions, 984356 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

My wife refuses to do oral sex...what can I do?

Tagged as: Marriage problems, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 November 2005) 14 Answers - (Newest, 3 March 2012)
A male , anonymous writes:

My wife refuses to do oral on me and does not like me doing it on her.

What can I do?

View related questions: oral sex

<-- Rate this Question

Reply to this Question


Share

Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question!

A male reader, Poly Nigeria +, writes (3 March 2012):

Let ur wife know the importance of oral sex. Make her understand that it makes sex life pleasurable. Try also perform it on ur wife.

<-- Rate this answer

A male reader, Keith.Long United States +, writes (26 December 2011):

No, you can't just say nothing can be done, period. And? Are you going to live with compromises the whole life. Well hopefully you wont. Man, you can persuade your wife somehow, now listen, she might not like how your cum or precum taste, so eat some fruit I don't know, google for that, she might find it disgusting, well in that case you give her oral couple of times (learn how to do it well, hopefully she'll appreciate that) and improve your sex, make her addicted to how you pleasure her, and when you do that, cut all that down, and make her wonder how to get that back. So that's for the physical part. On psychological part you need to start behaving bossy, not as a jerk but as a boss, you are the man, so behave like one. Good luck. Those are some general principles, I read most of that in Jacks Blow Job Persuasion guide, and really got some results. And just to know a guide to getting oral sex (BJ to be more exact) isn't a thing you could ask a good guy, you need to ask a jerk, he's getting it and you're not. No really try reading it you're self. Google for it.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, Keith.Long United States +, writes (26 December 2011):

No, you can't just say nothing can be done, period. And? Are you going to live with compromises the whole life. Well hopefully you wont. Man, you can persuade your wife somehow, now listen, she might not like how your cum or precum taste, so eat some fruit I don't know, google for that, she might find it disgusting, well in that case you give her oral couple of times (learn how to do it well, hopefully she'll appreciate that) and improve your sex, make her addicted to how you pleasure her, and when you do that, cut all that down, and make her wonder how to get that back. So that's for the physical part. On psychological part you need to start behaving bossy, not as a jerk but as a boss, you are the man, so behave like one. Good luck. Those are some general principles, I read most of that in Jacks Blow Job Persuasion guide, and really got some results. And just to know a guide to getting oral sex (BJ to be more exact) isn't a thing you could ask a good guy, you need to ask a jerk, he's getting it and you're not. No really try reading it you're self. Google for it.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, Sincair United Kingdom +, writes (22 October 2010):

If your wife ar any other woman you meet refuses to do oral sex then leave her for one that will. In my vast experience with women one rule generaly leeds to another until you end up having your sexual encounters with her dictated to you.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, USTAAD Denmark +, writes (24 October 2009):

Its very common issue because so many girls avois it. But I think if you really want it, just buy a condom and putt it on and then ask your wife for oral sex. I hope issue will solve.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A female reader, Hailey S. Canada +, writes (16 August 2009):

I used to not like giving my husband head either...but then he got this "program" called Oral Formula One that "supposedly" has a 100% guarantee that it can help you get you wife or girlfriend to give you head.

Well, it worked! My husband didn't tell me about Oral Formula One until 3 months after he had purchased it.

It's a step-by-step guide that basically uses NLP techniques to "Influence" your wife "subconsciously" to give you oral on a regualr basis. Not so sure about all the NLP stuff...but it works!!

He's now getting head from me 3-4 days per week.

Check it out http://www.OralFormualaOne.com

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, Yosambo United States +, writes (14 July 2009):

Let me lay out the ugly truth for you buddy. In my experience, when a woman won't give a blowjob, there are various reasons. The first, she may be sexually lazy. I'll spend hours trying to make my wife cum and she'll spend five minutes half heartedly working me with her mouth. And she doesn't want to improve technique. Upon politely mentioning to her that I would like for her to learn a new "trick", she got pissed. So, if your woman always has to be on bottom, and rarely wants to throw anything new into the bedroom, she's probably lazy. The second would be, women are more prone to phobias than men are. They may have been taught at a young age that it was just gross, or went through a relationship were the guy demanded oral all the time. In my 7 years of marriage, my wife has only gotten me off with her mouth twice, without me having to work my dick myself. She's the only woman ever able to do that. For some reason, women can't understand they can bleed a man dry with just good sex. If my wife gave me a blowjob once or twice a week, on top of just sex 3 to 4 times a week, she would live in the cleanest house, eat the finest foods and never have to work a day in her life again. You ladies may not like my answer and consider completely wrong ,but you guys know I'm right. How many of you guys would do anything for a woman who made sure you were sexually satisfied?

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, kcmoney United States +, writes (27 June 2009):

Well, my first girlfriend and I broke-up over the oral sex issue. She refused to give it to me, however, she wanted it done to her. When I started to refuse, she became upset. She started doing it but only half-heartedly. She always used the excuse that I did not have a problem with going down on her, but it made her feel cheap. Course, she did not view this as hypocritical. After I broke-up with her, she eventually married someone else and so did I. I imagine we are both happy with our marriages. In the end, we were just not compatible. No harm no foul. You have to make a decision on how important is oral sex to you? Can you honestly be happy living without it? If you can, great. If you can't......

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A female reader, kellylogan623 United States +, writes (19 June 2009):

I would strongly reccommend you check out this site... http://www.oralformulaone.com I never used to like giving my husband oral, but now I love it. This site really helped us out.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2005):

I have the same problem, We have been together in 10 years but she says penis is not for mouth. But she like to be licked

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2005):

are you gonna let her eat your buggers and earwax too....common....you want her to put her mouth on your dick before or after she prays and kisses her mom?stop being selfish

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A female reader, yakyakfire +, writes (28 November 2005):

God damn! If your wife asked you to let her pee in your mouth would you do it?

No of course not. Forget Power maybe that is the whole problem. Accept that your wife has issues with giving you oral sex and let her know it is not a problem. Make sure your wife understands how much pleasure it would give you to perform it on her. Make sure she is completely relaxed before you try it.

It took me five years of knowing my husband before I let him go down on me and another three before I did it for him.

Give it time and if it doesn't happen you did'nt marry her for her oral abilities, find other ways to enjoy each other and don't be a pratt about it

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2005):

Hi there: I am sorry to hear about your problem but I think if you truely love her you will be willing to dismiss oral sex. You can discuss and reason together about all the whys until you two can arrive to an answer. What a married couple do in their bedroom is mutual but I think it is wrong to force another person to do what one does not want to do. I can understand her feelings because I myself do not like it. Please forgive me if I honestly say, " to me it is abnormal" (Please forgive me I do not mean offense)I simply feel yucky to do this kind because I feel the mouth is only for eating to nourish us physically and not meant for something else. I was very naieve when I was married. My husband suddenly started persuading me to do oral sex. I also suddenly discovered his strange nudes magazines all in action. At first I was able to avoid his asking (which he tells me as icing or ice cream) but through the years he kept pushing me and I did it just to please him but deep inside me I was really suffering. Its just not my choice...until today I still feel like I want to scream!!! And run for my life each time I am reminded how he made me do it for hours and especially while he was driving from one state to another. It made me felt like I was a worthless dog. That's all I did in his car and when he laid himself to bed. Before I use to think when 2 people love each other mutual sex is wonderful and live happily ever after, live in a clean nice happy home with happy children, grow together...expand our minds...equally yoked together..etc...but now I just do not want to be married anymore...I hope you and your wife will be able to get help or solve the problem...All I say here is not meant to be judgemental or hurt anyone...I am just sharing my experience and what I personally feel about certain type of sex...

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2005):

Not much. You can try to get her to get an education about sex, and see an sex therapist- if she won't go, go yourself, and maybe the therapist can give you some ideas and materials to share with your wife about oral sex, so that your wife will learn that it is both natural, and fun. Your wife also needs to know how much power oral sex gives to her over a man, and, or course, how good oral sex can feel to her. Some people have been trained to believe that feeling good is bad, or evil or sinful. They truly believe they will go to hell if they engage in certain behavior. These people are sexually dysfunctional, and unless they get professional help and change, they are in for a rocky relationship with their spouses. They don't understand why their spouses want them to experience such things, and, until they do, they will never know that answer. If she has a girlfriend you can get to talk to her about oral sex, ask the girlfriend(s) to get involved. Otherwise, you may just have to do without. Tough choice, and most men would rather quit than fight. good luck to you.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

New answers are blocked to this question

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.0625!