A
female
age
13-15,
TAYL0Rshawtyy.
writes:Okay, I have this boyfriend and we we've been going out for about 1 month now. We also went out last year for 3 months. I really love him and he promised not to break my heart like he did earlier so we're doing really well now and one of my friends is flirting with him like crazyyy and she's been known to be really two-faced! she'll talk about everyone behind their back and then she's hanging out with them hours later! it gets on my nerves ! I overhear her telling my boyfriend embarrassing things about me when I'm not close. She touches his arm, tries to make him laugh, showers him with compliments and laughs at everything he says! He won't laugh at the things she tells him about me, even if it is funny though. When I ask her about it she acts like she doesn't know what I'm talking about and when I say 'you're always trying to touch him and you're always laughing at everything with him' she'll reply like 'noo. we're just playing, we have fun together'. it annoys me so much!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 March 2008): I'm dealing with this same issue right now. I think that the person who made the comment containing the 3 suggestions has very good advice.
I chose to tell the guy I was dating about my friend's (who is also my roommate) inappropriate behavior and how it bothered me when she would flirt with him. Unfortuantely, I must have pressed the issue so much because she does this so frequently and it's getting more and more annoying, that he took my concern as insecurity. We're now no longer dating because the issue literally consumed our relationship.
I still agree that you should definitely tell your boyfriend what your friend is up to. However, don't press the issue like I did. After being so fed up with eachother toward the end, he betrayed me by telling my friend everything that I had said about her in regards to her inappropriate behavior. Basically, two relationships were ruined. Could have been for the better you could say, but it sure doesn't feel too pleasant and I hope you should never have to go through that.
Best of luck, and try to ignore this bothersome friend...
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2008): Afraid there is precious little you can do except tell Little Miss Temptress to back the heck off if she values her health.
There is nothing intrinsically wrong with flirting, infact its quite healthy, it only becomes a problem if it extends beyond that.
Flynn 24
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister +, writes (2 March 2008):
 How irritating! When I was younger I had a friend like this and she was the type of person that always needed a lot of attention. As soon as I had a boyfriend, she would start to act like they were best friends and hang all over him. In my situation, when I asked her about it like you did, she said the same thing and it almost made things worse. I think the more you show that it bothers you with these types, the more attention they feel they are getting. This leaves you in quite a quandry:
1. Tell him and let him know this is what she does and for him not to react to it and neither will you. The only problem with this is that it still is making things about her and you run the risk of coming off insecure. You will then get caught up in if he's responding to her or not.
2. Not say anything and stop talking to your friend about anything to do with your boyfriend. Just act bored or apathetic when he is brought up. You could even start talking with great enthusiasm about a new or current friend you have like that person is just so special - she may shift her focus. This is still a lot of work on your part but this is what ended up working for me.
3. Have a good talk with your boyfriend about how each of you, in general, should handle flirting with the opposite sex. This is probably the most productive way to go about your situation. The only risk here is if he goes against what you agree with this friend of yours, it will now be about your relationship and not your friend. You will be wondering if he is such a good boyfriend after all. But if he does follow your agreement, you may see what a great boyfriend he is and this would have made your relationship stronger!
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A
female
reader, baybee-x-sparkii  +, writes (2 March 2008):
 talk to your boyfriend try and make him see how much its annoying you. and then ignore her shes not worth it sweetie
x
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