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female
,
anonymous
writes: I am having the hardest time getting over my son's father. We split up over 3 years ago and he has come back to me after his ex did what he did to me. Now it's been a little over 1 year ago he came back in my life and it's been up and down and now it's been 5-6 months since we've talked or seen each other and what??? I am truly in love with him, and he knows this but for some reason he goes away when things get to be where it's like we are in a relationship or something. The other part is he is my child's father and our child is 6. He doesn't even keep in touch just for him. The thing is to get to me he comes around for our child but when we don't talk he dissapears completely and usually I will find him and go off. This time I haven't said anything at all! I can't keep doing that, I'm giving up and so it just stays like this total nothing. And I can't seem to hate him and move on. That's only a piece of the whole story. I want to know what you think he wants and thinks of me.And in the beginning when he walked out on my son and me it was because he couldn't deal with his own insecurities about himself and how my family thought of him being not good enough for me.Thanks.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, pops +, writes (8 October 2005):
Throw the bum out! If he won't even spend time with his son, you both would be better off without him. And get professional counseling for yourself. You don't have to hate the man. The opposite of Love is not Hate: it is indifference. I think you are about there. Stop letting him be a sponge. Then move on and find a man who will love you, as well as be in love with you. If you are fortunate to both be in love with him, and love him, you have the beginnings of a better life.
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