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anonymous
writes: I am a father-of-three from Birmingham, who's been married for 20 years.My 16-year-old son has recently been in trouble at school over allegations of having 'food fights'; he's just been suspended for a week for having one in the canteen.He even got his school banned from McDonald's for a week due to his behaviour.I've tried speaking to him about it, but he refuses to, I've even cut off pocket money (but to no avail!), and he's still indulging in this behaviour.What should I do about his behaviour??? No matter what punishment I give, he refuses to give up on food fights.Nigel
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2006): Again I have the feeling that this is the same person who posted the question about his son liking to wear bikini's and before that about his son liking to strip off in class. I am pretty sure this is another one of those hoax questions set by a teenager and mates who think that this is an amusing thing to do.
Sorry. but hey, that is my opinion.
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female
reader, Clarey  +, writes (8 May 2006):
 It looks like attention-seeking behaviour. I knew someone whose son set fire to things, including a whole barn once to get attention. Do you spend much time with him? Is he acheiving in other ways and does he have good self-esteem?
I was a biker when I was a teenager. My husband was a punk rocker. Everyone has their thing. Food fighting does not seem like a very cool interest, but perhaps he is just trying to find a way to be different and noticed. You could find out whether there is anything he would like to do such as a sport (motorcross, canoing, another physical sport) which would seem much more cool in front of his peers.
I am thinking how toddlers throw their food about when they are bored or angry. Perhaps that is how he feels. You could say that this looks just like toddler behaviour - but seems a bit odd coming from a teenager. Wouldn't he like to vent his energy in a more exciting way? Then if he agrees to stop, offer to help him with his new hobby after a while of maintaining good behaviour. Make it time for him and you?
This symptom could have any number of causes and you could try to find out what they are if you don't get anywhere yourself. There is a service in my area called Children and Adults Mental Health Services (CAMHS) which he could be referred through via his GP or school. They are expert at exploring and helping with behavioural issues.
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