A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Well the problem is not mine but it is a relationship problem.my mum has a new boyfriend and theyve been dating for almost a year but never seem to have a stable relationship, she is an alcoholic and treats him badly sometimes and causes him to walk out sometimes.it upsets me because me and my younger brothers have gotten close to his 3 children who our all our ages and we dont want to be stuck in the middle of everything all the time. he has faults too like, when he makes coffee he leaves his spoons on the counter and it leaves stains and he never does his fair share around the house and when my mum tries to talk to him about it he goes berserk and says he never did anything wrong. yet everytime they split up they are back together within a month saying they are really in love only to find a few weeks later they are arguing again. what should i do?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (2 May 2008):
 First of all to the little miss womder, we are not annoying.
First of all, when dealing with (annoying) adults, there is not much you can do. Just like with raising kids, instructions are not given in having relationships. The problem is you have two people (which alcohol doesn't help much) who when they argue believe one is right and the other is wrong.
Like with this other poster, some adults are annoying, but her statement seems as if she's pinning that on all adults. Is she wrong, or am I wrong. My daughter doesn't see me as annoying, but sees her mom as annoying.
When your mom and her boyfriend argue, their trying to win. A disagreement is not about winning, its about seeing an issue from a different angle, and resolving so both are satisfied.
Now about you. You're growing up in a home that I know some of this behavior is confusing. Remember this, the home you grow up in does not determine who you will be when you grow up. You are able to become anyone you choose to be.
Take care.
A
female
reader, WiccanWonder +, writes (2 May 2008):
 Just keep out of there arguing, you cant do anyhting about it, to be honest! Its adult problems, trust me you will get in trouble if you try to help... adults are annoying aren't they?
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