A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:this is kind of complicated i will try to make it simple and get to the point. i have known this man for a few months. things got really intense really fast (in a good way.) i knew the moment i saw him that this is who im supposed to be with. the thing is i love him. i have never loved anyone so much so fast. its like we hit fast forward on our relationship. we live together already and everything is great. except he is kind of a free spirit. he doesn't believe in labels so we don't call ourselves bf/gf. but we are in a committee relationship despite the no labels. my only issue is he knows i love him because i told him. but he says he is not sure how he feels. he says he cares but is not sure he loves me. i honestly believed from his actions that he does. he is sweet. he is great with me and my son. he works hard for us to have a home. takes care of me when im sick. he is amazing. i just don't know how to deal with the fact that heir not sure he loves me. could it be that because he is a free spirit the words are just in the way? should i just be patient and wait for him to feel how i feel? is it possible he doesn't love me and maybe just takes him longer to feel like i do. i guess i just feel that because he is older (12 years, he is 36) he would be more ready to settle down. also just to add something about him he is 36 never married and no children. some people have told me this is a red flag but he says he just never met the right person to have a life with. i just don't know what to think and when he told me he isn't sure how he feels it shocked me because his actions show me otherwise at times. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (9 January 2011):
 Well you have only knowning him for a few months that really is not all that long and everybody is different and fall in love at different paces. You fell for him to hard to fast now my advice would be to let him have a chance to fall in love with you.
Am sure he cares a great deal for you but if he says he is not in love yet then let it be, dont keep telling him you love him and asking him as it will make him feel rushed and it may drive a wedge in between the both of you.
It sounds to me like you are quite happy in the relationship so dont worry about three little words just take things as they come and let it come naturally to him.
Just because he is 36 and has never been married or have children doesnt mean that it should be a red flag sign. It shouldnt mean that you should be worried.
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