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My husband masturbates and he thinks it's perfectly normal...

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Question - (29 June 2005) 14 Answers - (Newest, 3 October 2011)
A , *lisa writes:

Is it normal for a happily married man to masturbate? My husband recently admitted that he still masturbates and thinks this is perfectly normal behaviour we have a good sex life, is it normal for happily married men to masturbate?

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A male reader, tdactyluk1 United Kingdom +, writes (3 October 2011):

It's very normal, and I masturbate to porn on the web, cos I need to.

My girlfriend doesn't always want sex, and it took all of my nerve to ask, but I now masturbate white she watches me, and she even tells says, when I ask for sex. "Wank yourself off, and I'll watch you" It's a real turn on for me.

We do have sex too, but both are nice.

Terry

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A male reader, Tarnished Knight Italy +, writes (20 December 2009):

Are you kidding me? Yes, we all masturbate, single, married, unhappy, happy, male, female, young and old. It is normal and OK. It says nothing against your marriage, friendship, etc. It is absolutely OK. We dont always have time to make love or have sex. Sometimes, we just need the release without a lot of fan fair...My advise, chill out. Accept it and turn it into a positive. Dont dawn the robes of the judge because you will hurt your relationship. Embrace him and all of his qualities and you will open doors that you did not know existed.

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A male reader, AnalyzeIt United Kingdom +, writes (21 August 2009):

It is normal. It would be weird not to.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (15 November 2007):

Most emphatically, YES. It is perfectly normal for married men, happily or otherwise, to masturbate. Some men like to masturbate several times daily, others far less frequently, and some only rarely, but most men, even married ones, like doing it at least sometimes.

Here's are some suggestions which might help you enhance your sex life:

Rather than worrying about your husband's masturbation habits, take an interest and talk to him about them. Find out what he likes to imagine while playing with himself and see if you can be a little creative about helping him enact some of his fantasies with you.

Consider asking if he would allow you to watch him doing it, and if he says yes, make sure you give him lots of encouragement - most men find this a big turn-on but are often a bit shy about getting started. You might also learn a few things about how he likes having his penis touched for those times when you do it for him.

If you are feeling a bit more bold you could offer to pose nude for him to look at you while he does it, or even suggest that you would like to masturbate with him so you may both watch each other doing it. If you try either of these ideas, I'm willing to bet you and your husband will end up so excited that in no time at all you will be doing them regularly.

As a happily married man for over ten years, I can assure you that enjoying any type masturbation play with your partner will do your relationship no harm whatsoever.

My gorgeous, sexy wife and I both love anything to with masturbating together and usually do so 2-3 times a day. Besides performing the act of masturbation on each other, we both find it is an enormous turn-on watching and being watched while masturbating in front of each other. We equally enjoy any combination of either technique, and regard this as "helping" each other to wank off. We also love to share very explicit sexual talk with each other while watching each other masturbate - always admiring, complimentary and encouraging towards our partner's masturbation, but also about our sexual desires, fantasies and experiences in general.

You could definitely say we are both highly sexed which helps our sex life a lot, and we both prefer being naked most of the time - mainly so we are more easily able to enjoy more sex more often. My lovely wife likes encouraging me to masturbate in front of her any time I feel like it, and she mostly becomes pretty aroused herself whenever she sees me doing it. She always genuinely enjoys posing nude for me; explicitly parting and playing with her pussy as she watches me, and always urging me to enjoy having a good look at her nude body while I show her how I like to pleasure myself.

Even if she is not in the mood to start with, the sight of me becoming aroused from looking at her naked, and then playing with my cock in front of her is usually enough to start her juices flowing, and more often than not we end up playing together until we both cum.

We do also love plenty of oral sex and intercourse too, and playing few other naughty games of our own besides, but at least 75% of the time we both prefer indulging in some variation of what we like to call mutual masturbation.

Hope this helps. Good luck.

Peter B. xxx

http://profiles.yahoo.com/ssendodo

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (23 October 2007):

99% of guys masturbate, once per day!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2006):

I had the same concerns with my husband and even though it might be normal, that does not deal with the emotional distress is causes the masterbaters partner of failure of the ability to completey satisfy your partner. As a women you would like to think that you are so good in bed that he does not need to please himself otherwise. But i think now it does not matter how good you are there goung to do it any way!

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A reader, schlottjl United States +, writes (30 June 2005):

schlottjl agony auntIt is not only normal but good for your relationship so long as you don't spoil it. If he were to do it so much that he did not have anything left for you then that is not okay.

If you get from him what you need sexually, then his hobby could help him stay up longer and allow you to enjoy sex too.

Nothing like pre-ejack. problems to start a downward spiral leaving both partners unfulfilled.

So long as he is there for you sexually, let the man be a man. You married a man and that most often comes with the territory. Be afraid if he ever stops!

Now enjoy!

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A reader, pops +, writes (29 June 2005):

Yes, this is normal. Its also normal for Women who are married to masturbate. Who cares how many times the engine is warmed up as long as its parked in your garage every night? Pops

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2005):

Yes..it's perfectly normal. Masturbation allows a healthy way to express & explore your sexuality and to release sexual tension. This private touching is a natural,normal mode of self-exploration and sexual expression. It is nothing to ever be ashamed of. Masturbation can help relieve stress and help insomnia (i.e. when a person is having trouble falling asleep). It stimulates the immune system to help build up resistance to common infections

It helps to release mood elevating hormones. And it just makes many people calmer and relaxed, in general.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2005):

Don't worry. There is nothing wrong with what your husband is doing. Masturbation is a normal thing even within a marrage. Maybe he just doesn't get enough pleasure from you, but that isn't your fault. The feeling you get from masturbation is completely different to what you get from sex. Don't worry, there's nothing wrong, your husband obviously wants both feelings. It'll be ok.

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A reader, helpfull girl +, writes (29 June 2005):

Sorry love, but near enough all men masturbate. Put it this way: I work at an elderly residental home! I have walked in on a few men old men masturbating.

Husbands, wives, single people & even elderly please themselvs in some sort of way! So yep, it's normal.

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A reader, Bufus +, writes (29 June 2005):

Masturbation is a natural thing and doesn't have to stop once you are married.If your sex life is good anyway-then whats the problem?If he spent more time looking else where then you must speak to him about it but if it is only occassionally then I wouldn't worry. I believe it is through masturbation we really become aware of our sexuality and maybe you could see it in more of a positive light-he is your husband and loves you very much-dont'worry about it.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2005):

There's nothing wrong with a man or woman masturbating. I'm married and 73 years old and I do it every day, all my life.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2005):

I am female and I am in a very happy relationship with a good sex life, however, ~I often masturbate. this doesnt mean im not happy with my sex life (i am) Im just highly sexed and sometimes it relieves my tension, perhaps its the same for your husband?

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