A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: />My husband is a workaholic.We went on holiday to France recently, and even then he couldn't stop working, bringing all his accountancy books with him when we were out at a restaurant, and trying to do business deals over the mobile phone - a complete nightmare.He treated the holiday as an office away from home. He just can't seem to rest and gets cranky, unhappy and depressed if not away from work.He earns a large amount of money from his business, well, technically, his best friend's business, which he works for.I do love him, but miss that loving feeling we had.I'm pregnant by him too, and he seems to be working longer and longer hours.When we met about 4 years ago in April 2005, I was impressed by his dedication to his work as the manager of a bookstore., but now it's become just a little over-the-top. He was also very fun to be with back then, despite having dedication to his work.I like him for him, not his money - when I met him, he didn't have much back then and worked in a bookstore (a chain one, you know, like Borders is in the U.S.A.) as a manager, but then from 2006, he got a new job in his best friend's e-business and life got better for him. Since February 2008 he's become a workaholic and life has gone downhill since.Talking to him hasn't helped. He just rants at me, and says "I NEED TO WORK. I MUST SPEND MORE TIME AT THE OFFICE. MY JOB IS IMPORTANT!"I tried to humour him by saying to him that no one ever gets a tombstone with the words "I Wish I Had Spent More Time at the Office" on it! Even that didn't deter him from his workaholism.I tried having a romantic night in with him one night, but he abandoned it, and went straight to the home office to do yet more work. I felt so upset - I'd spent a fair bit of money on sexy lingerie and nice food for him, and he rejected it to do yet more work.I know how to have a healthy work-life balance, but it seems he doesn't, or has probably forgotten how to.I would like some help in how to try and get him back to being the fun, loving caring person he was and not being such a workaholic.This makes me feel ill just thinking about it.Please help me.
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best friend, depressed, money, on holiday Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, makeyourwifehot  +, writes (6 July 2009):
Well, if what you are doing doesn't work, try something different!!!
Encourage his work. Talk about what he does. Show a sincere interest in what he does. Get educated about his industry. When he sees you are interested in what he likes, he will open up more...I guarantee it.
Your romantic overtones are impressive! His not responding is disappointing I am sure.
AFTER you engage in his biz talk...try a night at a place without internet and no cell phone service (log cabin, etc.)
Focus on REDUCING his stress romantically, sexually, and with a massage, etc. See my resources at makeyourwifehot.com for ideas on how to help him be more than just a worker....but a lover, too.
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