A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:i have known my husband for three years and married just one year.i am entrily fed up of my situation.he used to be romantic and take the time to please me.but now he nearly speaks to me.i am a stay at home housewife. i do everything for him but am only allowed contact with people of his choosing. i would like to get a cat for company but he wont allow it.he says he loves me but his actions and behaviour say otherwise.he wont kiss me passionatly or anything else emotionaly connected with being involved , a peck on the cheek is just about the only attention he gives me.please could anyoneone give a suggestion as to wether hes interested or not.i am unsure that i want to be with him anymore. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 February 2011): He only lets you talk to the people he wants, and he won't even let you have a cat? He sounds like he has big issues with jealousy (at the very least), and is a huge control freak. This is not a healthy relationship. Even if he was kissing you and being affectionate this would still be a an abusive relationship. Just because you're a housewife doesn't mean you don't have rights. I would suggest you both go talk to a marriage counselor.
A
male
reader, Captain Ziggy  +, writes (22 February 2011):
 You have to communicate this. Sit down and tell him what you're feeling, find out whats going on with him, then figure out a way to deal with it.
You've got to get the flair back. Go out to dinner, cook him a steak naked lol. Do you see each other much? I ask because theres nothing worse than seeing each other too much! And it happens, you both need enjoyment in life thats just for you. Make sure you both have interests that dont directly involve each other. Go bowling a night each week or something. But dont neglect each other either, both of you must feel wanted.
You guys need to talk. You said yourself that he rarely speaks to you. You have to let him know whats going on with you, be open about it and allow him to do the same.
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A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (22 February 2011):
 You need to sit your man down and talk to him, tell him how you are feeling, maybe he is feeling a bit overwhelmed by work issues.
Try and find something to interest you, perhaps a job, or charity work, something to occupy your mind.
IMHO it sounds like the romance has gone out of the marriage - its become dull, try to spice things up a bit. Talk to him and find out why he doesnt want you to interact with other people.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 February 2011): He sounds as if he is a selfish man who wants a housekeeper. Do not put up with a life which is only half a life. To get you he behaved well but now you are his he treats you shabbily. It takes two to make a marriage. This is 2011 for goodness sake now 1950. Decide what you want in life and set about making it happen.
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