A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, here's my problem: My girlfriend has a very close male friend with whom she sometimes goes out with (just the 2 of them) to plays and concerts. In addition she texts with him a whole lot and they call each other a lot too (even late at night like 1 am or so). When I ask her about him she says that he's a very close friend and that they've been friends from even before she got to know me. I still wasn't happy about the way this guy was acting so I asked her whether she's sure that he's only interested in her as a friend. This made her very angry and she started telling me that this guy is the one person that she'll tell everythin in her life to and trust with her life and told me not to judge people and to mind my own business. All I really wanted was some assurance that I wasn't watching while someone stole away my gf but that's not what i got. My problem is that even if he's only a close friend, why is there such a strong emotional bond between them? She tells him about everything that goes on in her life while she hides a lot of things from me and that hurts me. She refuses to tell me a whole lot of things and says that it's either a "long story" or "you don't need to know about it". Can someone please tell me if it's normal that i feel hurt? Can our relationship ever work this way?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2007): I think she simply has stronger feelings for him than you. If you can handle that, stay with her for now, but she is closer to him whether it's "friends" or whatever.
A
female
reader, Jualsy  +, writes (9 September 2007):
 Maybe its jealousy and all anger comes from pain. She has chosen a particular route and it's not wrong. You don't have any control over that. You have choices to make and you can make changes in your life too. Enjoy!!
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