A
male
age
30-35,
*ed Boy
writes:I told my girlfriend that I have a crush on another girl. That other girl is also a very good friend of mine. She is also the girlfriend of one of another good friend of mine. Now I don't like this girl, my girlfriend knows that. it's just a crush but a major crush at that. I keep thinking about her and keep having dreams about her. I had this one dream where she was in a bathroom with me and i slipped and fell in a bathtub full of water but when I was in it was like I fell in the ocean. I tried to swim back up and reached for the surface before i drowned. I grabbed on to her legs trying to get out of the water until my hand happened to reach her pussy which is when I woke up sweating. Now I don't intend to act on this because like I said it's just a crush and I love my girlfriend. It's just such an intense crush and now I still gotta tell the girl and my friend about it. I don't want them to get mad at me, plus the girl might like me. What do I do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2010): You have high moral standards! And you are very honest. Those are wonderful qualities in a person, and I think your friends and girlfriend are lucky to be involved with a person like you! Be gentle and use your words very carefully. telling your friend you think his girlfriend is beautiful and that if you were both single you would have liked to date her is one thing; telling him that you have a huge thing for her right now will make things awkward for everyone. Just be articulate and nonchalant. good luck with everyone!
A
male
reader, Red Boy +, writes (19 April 2010):
Red Boy is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI told my girlfriend because I didn't want to be keeping things from her. Not telling her or anyone makes me feel like I have weight on my shoulders. Besides she's done the same to me in the past. Well sort of and it hurt alot. Anyway, I feel like I have to tell my friend and the girl now so I can relieve myself of all of this. I'm not the type that can keep emotions secret and be alright about it. Im really stuck in an ocean of emotions. That was really good advice. I need to tell them, otherwise I feel like I'm lying to them.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2010): The dream was probably symbolizing your feelings of being overwhelmed. You feel like you have drowned yourself in all of this drama, and you can't get out. You fear that you will not be able to get out of this. You reached for her because she is the reason you have thrown yourself into this ocean of emotions!Anyway, crushes are normal and totally healthy, even in a relationship. Crushes bring back that sense of being single and flirty. They remind you that you are a sexual being, and bring that reminder home with you! They are good for a relationship! However, if you take that crush out of your head and act on it, in any way, that is very bad for the relatonship. Did you feel you had to tell your g/f because you may have acted on the crush? If it truly was all in your head, than telling your g/f was just TMI. What you do now will be determined by your g/f's reaction. I would just drop it and see what happens. Its not a big deal, but now that you told her, it will be bigger than it needs to be.
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