| A
male
,
anonymous
writes: My girlfriend recently left to travel overseas with her friend, who by the way, doesn't like me at all.We had been together for a year and a half. I am 27 and she is 21. Because I had already been overseas and traveled, she wanted to do it on her own, which I completely understood. We decided that the best way to do it was to break up and let destiny take it's cause.In the first week she was ringing still and saying she still loved me. I was very cautious of holding her back and in some ways I was aloof because I wanted her to be free and so did she.By the end of the 4 week we had been in contact nearly every day in one way or another. She said she was hating traveling and missed me and didn't want to lose me and still wanted to be together. She said she was coming home. I agreed reluctantly to accept taking her back because I was unsure whether she was just hedging her bets in case she came back early and was worried that if she started enjoying it she'd change her mind. She reassured me and said that she would never do that to me.Her friend was coming home as well. She started to really enjoy herself but was torn between wanting to keep me and staying on. She didn't want to be alone when her friend left. I suggested going over to be with her instead of her coming back. I didn't want her to resent me for coming back and besides I really wanted her to have fun over there, considering how long she had saved up for it. She was so happy that I decided to come. She told me that she couldn't wait to be able to give us a proper go without the feeling of her leaving all the time etc.In the last 2 weeks she really started to enjoy herself because she didnt have to worry about me or miss me anymore, knowing that we were together again.I bought my ticket and was set to go until the day before I left. She rang me and said she doesn't want me anymore. She said she hates everything we had before she left and that I'm controlling and possessive. She says that she's never felt so free as she has in the last 2 weeks and doesn't want anything more to do with me. I haven't had any contact from her in the last week except for a very nasty email last night, saying everything in writing that she said on the phone when breaking up.I'm so confused!! I was being so unselfish and only doing everything for her happiness.I had planned to propose to her over there.I dont know what to do. I'm a mess!!!! There was no signs whatsoever. I had an email from her 2 hrs before she broke up with me saying she couldn't wait and loved me.What happenned??Has she just freaked out??
View related questions:
broke up Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, willywombat  +, writes (14 April 2006):
 No. She has moved on and grown up and wawy from you whilst she was away. Dont obsess about this and try to kove on yourself. Please. for your own sake dont bother contacting her either it will only lead to more heartache for yourself.
A
female
reader, Anja +, writes (13 April 2006):
 Oh boy...she does sound very confused!!! Maybe she thought that you would break up with her as you hadn't come across as being that enthusiastic in taking her back initially, so was getting in there first (unlikely but possible...us women are strange!!) There was no need for her to send you a nasty e-mail, it must make you wonder what you did wrong. You dealt with things the best way you knew how. Did you tell her and re-confirm to her your love for her whan she broke up with you? You deserve an answer for her behaviour, it sounds like she is not being honest with you and blaming you. Not a good basis for a relationship. You both need to TALK, tell her how you feel...I mean REALLY how you feel, you may be suprised. If she refuses to meet/talk then you know for certain that she is lying to you and herself in what she wants...do not get nasty back, the best thing to do is to remain cool and calm, it will catch her off guard, if she starts shouting she is wanting a reaction...and your better then that not to go to her level!! Good luck..hope I have been kinda helpful ish...take care!!
...............................
|
