| A
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I had this best friend for about the past 8 years. She started being rude and two faced and she started hanging out with the "popular/known" group. Eventually we had lost our closeness and she was ditching me. My friend then developed an attitude and started acting like she was God’s gift to men. We haven’t talked since January and she called me last month when she had some time before work. She wants to hang out again- sounds like I’m the "back up friend." When I confront her about it and she says, “No, I miss you! You’re my number one friend!” Things are okay for a little bit, but then the cycle starts all over again and she leaves me for them. I felt betrayed b/c I was always there for her from day one, never ditched her for anyone.I consider loyalty, trust, and communication as part of a solid friendship. I just feel over the years, the girls that I have met and have become friends with just don't value the same thing in friendships. I'm just confused and hurt. A lot of girls that I know are constantly flaky, don't return phone calls for weeks, and come to me only when they need a favor. I just don't understand this.Why do I keep attracting these types of people? How do I find friends who value loyalty?
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female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (10 April 2010):
 I think it's time for YOU to meet new friends. :) You obviously is a good friend and your "ex" best friend wants you around. Maybe she has realized that the people she keeps ditching your for aren't really good at being friends like you are, but she is too weak , low self esteem to ditch them.
She has become a user & a taker. Not much in the friends department unless it suits HER. Honestly I would become unavailable to her and seek out new people.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (10 April 2010):
Because you are a loyal, nice, lovely person. And people like you attract people like them because you represent a sort of stability they don't have. Don't stop being loyal and lovely, because there are some good people out there who will make better friends. It just takes time for you to get to know them and work out who you can trust. Don't be afraid to continue meeting new people.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (10 April 2010):
 You are like a doormat. When their feet are dirty ,they will come to you and wipe their dirty feet on you . Stop being a doormat to them. They are only taking advantage of your friendliness , gentle and kind nature .
True friends are difficult to find. Only time will tell who are your true friends.
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