A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I've been super close with my male cousin (who is two months older than me) since we were newborns. We're now both 21 and things are just friggin' weird between us. He's always been the shy cousin while I've been the outgoing one trying to get him to take risks and what not. In fact, and I hate to admit this, but I'm the reason he broke his arm when we were seven. (I dared him to jump off a swing at peak point.)Anyway, this Christmas, I brought to our annual family get-together my boyfriend of three months. When I went to introduce my cousin to my boyfriend, my cousin got pissed. Everyone in the family realizes that my cousin likes to play protective big brother to me but his reaction was over the top.When I talked to him in private about it, he told me that my boyfriend doesn't deserve me. That I deserve someone who knows me like no one else. I asked him what he meant and he said (and I quote), "I've been feeling so conflicted about this because your mom is my mom's sister. We're cousins so it's illegal but I can't stop it. I love you, *my name*. I want you to be mine."Yes, I was absolutely shocked and to be honest, kind of grossed out and disturbed. I decided not to tell anyone because that would be embarrassing for my cousin but apparently he just can't stop feeling this way. What do I do!? This is such a weird situation to be in!
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male
reader, bch +, writes (7 September 2011):
I think you should just tell him its not going to happen because you don't feel the same way about him. I really liked this girl and she hurt me so much when she rejected me. So I thought my female cousin would give me a chance and even she rejected me. Girls don't mind hurting me but they feel bad hurting other guys. It is so hard to move on and I still have not moved on. MY heart aches because I know I am so alone. But either way you will hurt him so just get it over with and hope he can cope with the rejection. If he doesn't cope with it or cope well with it I want you to know why. You are a just a girl. you just happen to be family. I thought well since my cousin is family then she will love me. But I was wrong. Even I got rejected by a cousin who I thought would never reject me because she is my family, my cousin, like my sister. He will learn the same thing too the hard way that family and best friends even reject him. People who I thought would never reject me. So do what you gotta do. But now remember he has to live with the consequences and rejection. Just think if you were rejected by someone you really cared about and loved. What would you do?
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2011): Actually I am from another point of view I am a male and actually I fell in love with my cousin(2nd) after some heartbreaking talks with me she found out that she loves me now I am not saying this will happen to you but if you feel like he is your brother tell him to take a step back and not hurting your friendship.
I know I hurt my cousin when saying bad things to her and then of just a sudden coincidence I said I love her she took it really hard and didnt want to talk with me until she realized that she actually loved me to. So simply just tell him that its not going to work out
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A
female
reader, aichew08 +, writes (29 December 2010):
Girl i know what your going through! My cousin did the same thing to me when i was 14 and he was 16 (hes a second cousin but still he's family) instead of telling me he SHOWED me. He straight up kissed me and i was so shocked i didnt know what do do but to stand there. ever since then i havent talked to or seen him. but somethings you cant help. Just let your cousin know that its not gonna happen and thats for certain. I know your going to be a little traumatized for a while but eventually you'll just learn to ignore it and hopefully he can find someone. Good luck!
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A
female
reader, NicoleMarie +, writes (29 December 2010):
 You should explain to him that you don't feel the same way about him. Tell him you are family, and you love him but not in that way. He can find a girl who he loves, and you can be with the man you love. Explain to him that he is your cousin, and you love him dearly, but you don't feel that way about him, you look at him as a big brother figure. Don't yell, or cuss at him, explain calmly. Maybe he will realize that this will never happen and it's wrong. Good Luck.Hope I helped. :)
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