A
female
age
30-35,
*hateveryousay
writes:My boyfriend is the least popular kid in the class and everybody is like,"ur really going out with him?!" and I don't know what to do because it's really bugging me and I dont want to dump him. What should I do? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, oldfool  +, writes (8 June 2008):
 Glad we could help!
A
female
reader, whateveryousay +, writes (7 June 2008):
whateveryousay is verified as being by the original poster of the question thnx again guys :) now that its summer, i dont have to worry about it! u guys helped so much :)
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A
female
reader, whateveryousay +, writes (24 May 2008):
whateveryousay is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthe thing is, i cant really notice quiet people because i am in the quiet group. there are about 10 people out of 32 people that still bother me. but before, when it was worse, it was 25 people! so i guess it is a bit better. and i definately wont dump him. thank you so much! :)
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A
male
reader, oldfool +, writes (24 May 2008):
Thanks for the update, and sorry to hear that things are still difficult.
First, let me say that when you're young you feel you've got to be like everyone else. It won't always be like this. People around you will gradually blossom and develop an understanding of life, but it will be some years down the track. At the moment you're still vulnerable to the tyranny of the group.
Secondly, I'd like to ask you, how many people in your class are really saying things about you going with your boyfriend? If you talk to some of the quieter people in the class, people you've never noticed because they're unattractive or uninteresting to you, you might find that what you think of as "everybody" is just a vocal minority. Or perhaps it's only your friends who are doing this to you.
Look around. Look at the people who aren't saying anything. Look at the people who aren't in your own group. And realise that not "everybody" is so narrow-minded and lacking in generosity.
When I look back on my school days, it's strange to realise that the ones who went on to find success or happiness in life weren't always "the crowd". There were quiet people who I never thought of as anything special who went on to live outstanding lives (not rich in money but rich in happiness).
So don't beat yourself up about "everybody" and their vocal comments about your boyfriend. If you dump him it will be a bigger loss than you can imagine. You'll look back in future years and regret what you did -- big time.
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A
female
reader, whateveryousay +, writes (23 May 2008):
whateveryousay is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhe is the least popular in the class because he was brought up with difficult parents and is a bit weird (only once in a great while). the kids have toned down a little but its still bad...
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A
male
reader, oldfool +, writes (12 May 2008):
To hell with the rest of the class!
You must see something in the guy that they can't. Have a bit of courage and stick to your choice. What would they know about him, anyway?
It's just a mob mentality. As you grow older, you'll find more and more that the mob isn't always right. If you break up with him, you'll have sacrificed a person -- a warm, thinking, loving person, a person that you cared enough about to get close to -- to the howls of the mob. And when you've got rid of him, what do you think they'll do to make up for it? I can tell you now, they'll do nothing. There'll just be a bit of self-satisfied gossip about how that creep got what he deserved.
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A
male
reader, Anonyman  +, writes (12 May 2008):
 all those peoples comments in school won't matter when you leave. think of this, who is more likely to still be around you after you have left a year or two? you are with him becuase you there's something about him that attracts you to him . they aren't effected by any of this so therefore they shouldn't have a say, and even if they do it's irrelevant.
just concentrate on being the best girlfreind you can be to him and enjoy yourself!
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A
female
reader, whateveryousay +, writes (11 May 2008):
whateveryousay is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you guys u rock!
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A
female
reader, sassymouse +, writes (11 May 2008):
 If you care about him stand up for him. Ignore what any one else says, its none of their business. If you tell them you dont care what they think they'll soon move on. Have the courage to stand up for yourself and your boyfriend and let the losers get a life! good luck!
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