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age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My bf and I have been together for almost 3 years. We get along great and we both are college students (don't live together). My problem is that my bf is a major homebody. His desire to be home all the time (cuddling, playing games, watching TV, etc) is contagious and I become lazy as well....He never wants to go out, travel anywhere....Last time we traveled was a year ago to Disney and it felt forced on his part (3 hr drive). We've never flown anywhere together. I'm seeing my friends and their S.Os travel to different countries together and I just feel completely left out. Sure, I could go alone, but what fun is that? I ask him if we can go somewhere and he says, flat out, "no" and he tells me to go without me....One of these days I fear that I will meet a guy who is super adventurous and I will want to leave my bf. It's not that I want extravagant trips to Paris or England, I just want a little spice... We don't go out, we don't do anything at all, just stay at his apartment. His excuse is always that he's "tight" with money (he's super cheap and his apartment is already paid off - plus his college pays him. And I work. And he gives me a huge guilt trip, saying that he enjoys spending time with me regardless of where we go ). What might the problem be ? I feel like this is a deal-breaker for me and I hope I don't sound irrational :/
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female
reader, Aunty Susie  +, writes (9 August 2012):
 You don't sound irrational, and it should be a deal-breaker. Has he always been this way? If he has, I don't see why he would, or should change. If you want more, then that is fair enough too. You will only become resentful if you give up living the way that you want to. You shouldn't have to feel guilty. Think very hard about getting seriously involved with someone who is so different from yourself, it will mean a lot more work to keep a relationship strong.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2012): This is a common problem especially in relationships where you generally feel 'comfortable' with each other. I would say let him know how you need some excitement and like to get out of the house every now-and then. And try to encourage him by linking it to things he likes as well, that you may not necessarily.
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A
male
reader, MikeEa1 +, writes (9 August 2012):
 you should talk to him a bit. people have different ways of fulfilling their lives and I like being out and about too. my ex didn't so I used to go out on my own a lot. I don't think it helped the relationship. Your boy will probably enjoy a bit of travel and a few outings once you retrain him. it probably is just laziness to some extent. he needs new habits.
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