A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:It has already been two years since i last wrote about my bf wandering eyes problem. Yes, two years had passed and my bf is still staring at girls when i'm just right beside him. i have spoken to him many many times regarding this problem. each time, he promised to change and wouldn't do it again. or he would say its just an accident that he stared and accidents happen... sigh..... i really feel like giving up. its so traumatizing. i even dreamt about him behaving in this manner and getting to know girls in my dreams and woke up feeling very upset. he can be nice to me at times but also gives me lots problems too. I'm really tired of reminding him not to stare at girls whenever we are in crowded places, and also checking to see whether he had been staring. please tell me whether i should give up on this three years relationship. what should i do? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 September 2009): Maybe youre asking him to do something that's not reasonable an he's simply trying to make you get off his case and shut up. Sounds co-dependant to me. He may need to grow up and explain to you that he's simply looking and that it's not a tramatizing event. You, on the other hand may need to go get some therapy and work on the issues that are causing you to try to control this guy.And, yes, do him a favor and dump him.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 September 2009): hi gina,
i don't have problem with my looks. when i go clubbing, i have guys asking for my numbers. hence, i can't be that hideous looking right. i can't accept this behavior cos i think its disrespectful to stare. i'm OK with glances. and yeah, come to think of it. if i were to stay with him, in due course, i would have low self esteem. cos i would be wondering what on earth is wrong with my looks that my boyfriend has to keep staring at every other girl on the street. i think respect is important in a relationship and can't be compromised.
original poster
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A
male
reader, wherestheinstructions?  +, writes (5 September 2009):
He's had at least two years to change and he hasn't, so either accept it or move on - personally, I would dump him, forget him and move on. That should give him plenty of time to admire other women.
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