Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2009): Well as long as he is with you at the time maybe but use protect is the best way. to be safe.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2009): I'm thinking one of two things:
He is cheating and feels guilty so he's trying to even things up by letting you.
or
He is afraid of you cheating on him out of curiosity and wants to let you know it's ok to want someone else (even tho its not) so he can know if you ever feel this way. It makes him feel safer if you know you can come talk to him if you ever feel like that instead of cheating or just hiding the feelings. This way he is still in charge of his own heart.
...............................
A
male
reader, turtle86  +, writes (5 July 2009):
 I know I am young and you don't have to take my advice but:1) He might have contracted a STI. Maybe or maybe not through sex as pubic lice can come from camping/ outdoor stuff. Herpes. I know you can get this with just contact with an infected person.2) He could be cheating on you and make you cheat on him so he feels less guilty when he dumps you or vise-versa. 3) He might be testing you on how much you actually love him. Or if you do at all. He might have some trust issues which than you can talk about with him. Saying he has nothing to worry about in your own way. 4) If he was intoxicated with drugs/ alcohol he might have just said something cause well... he was drunk/ wasted. He might be hinting on a threesome but you never know.I hope this helped. [:
...............................
A
female
reader, imcurioustoo  +, writes (5 July 2009):
imcurioustoo is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell maybe I should explain better what he said.. Well first of all he WAS intoxicated...but this is what he said .. His older friend was married and I guess at one point in their relationship the issue of having sex with other people came up.. My bf said to me you've only been with me I figured that you may get bored sometimes .. And maybe want to expierience something with somone else to see what its like .. I was very hurt when he said this .. I love him and would never take advantage of what he said and I told him that too.. Then I asked him . What brought about this statement? He said he just wanted me to know that if I was ever feeling like I needed to be with someone else that he would want me to come to him about it .. And that we'd discuss it.. He also told me that it may be because I've been spending time with my guy friend wes .. ( I NEVER hang out with other guys because it upsets my bf) ... could he be insecure right now because I've been spending time with another guy or is he saying something else?
...............................
A
female
reader, laura585 +, writes (5 July 2009):
Well this is coming from a girl fresh out of an abusive relationship- so if your boyfriend has never showed any signs of abusive/controlling behaivor then totally ignore what I'm going to say. Abusive guys tend to do things like this to "test" you. To see if you pass or fail. He'll allow you some "freedom" to see what you do with it. If you pass the test he'll keep trying to convince you that you should do it- if he does convince you that its something he REALLY wants- and you go thru with it then you've failed. Then he gets to show you the consequences for failing. Even though he practically forced you to do it in the first place-??? I dont get it, but I've experienced it. Like I said tho, not all guys are scum... but some definately are....... If this isnt the case its possible that he wants to have sex with other people - and if you do it, then he won't feel so bad if he does, if he hasn't already.
...............................
A
male
reader, tornNconflicted +, writes (5 July 2009):
He could very well be cheating but I think he's really trying to break up w/you and doesn't know how to tell you or doesn't have the guts. most guys will avoid emotional pain at all cost. It's the reason guys just don't call a girl after a bad first date instead of telling her they don't enjoy her company or don't think she's that attractive. Easier for them emotionally to blow her off. He may be saying he wouldn't mind if you were with another guy with the hopes you will stray and find someone else you like better. A) he can then justify your breakup by saying "she's a slut and cheated on me" or B) you finding soeone else gets him off the hook and out of the relationship. Either way he doesn't have to deal with the emotional pain of confronting you with the reasons he wants to breakup.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2009): That's not a good sign... It could mean he's trying to justify him wanting to sleep with someone else. I wouldn't assume he's cheating though, it could also be the threesome thing. You need to talk to him about it though, that is indeed a very hurtful thing for him to say.
...............................
A
female
reader, kaledrina  +, writes (5 July 2009):
 I would see that as an hint for a threesome? Maybe by telling you that he doesn't mind you sleeping with other people (note that he didn't say man, he said person) he's trying to see whether you would be open to the idea. I wouldn't necessarily jump to the conclusion that he's cheating. Talk to him anyway if it's bothering you :)
...............................
| 