A
female
age
26-29,
*mogurl321
writes:Okay this was my weekend!I went to my boyfriends house with his friends and when his one friend (Josh) saw me he ran up to me and hugged me and said i look sexy. my boyfriend got really really mad and pushed him off me i felt like he went a bit to far but i ignored it. later Josh came up to me and whispered that he was sorry about earlier. i smiled and said its okay don't worry about it? He smiled and kissed me. i pushed him off and my boyfriend came over and punched him in the face. I'm understand the fact his friend was all up on me might of well pissed him off but still i think he went a bit to far. we don't talk about this day anymore but i'm scared his jealously might get a little to far one day. he cusses anyone out who looks at me.. HELP ME! i need to talk to him but don't know what to say
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female
reader, emogurl321 +, writes (31 December 2011):
emogurl321 is verified as being by the original poster of the question ii dont enjoy the attention josh gives me but me and josh and my boyfriend have known each other for years now.. like since we were in kindergarden!
A
male
reader, Ldu  +, writes (20 December 2011):
uhhh JOSH went to far. Your bf did the correct thing , he saw someone disrespecting you and him and del with it . I would do the same . I Dont think you have to wrry too much about him punching many guys unless they step over the line and kiss you or touch you the way only your bf should .
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A
female
reader, Ciar +, writes (19 December 2011):
 Your boyfriend's reaction may have been a bit extreme, but it was certainly understandable. Josh is obviously very comfortable putting his lips and his hands on someone else's girlfriend and you have given him the green light.You'd be singing a very different tune if your boyfriend had hugged and kissed another girl and told her she was sexy. Josh doesn't push the envelope because he is so taken with you he can't help himself. He does it because he has zero respect for his friend, and thinks you're a floozy.It was made very clear to Josh that his behaviour crossed the line, a fact he acknowledged when he apologised, but he had to press the matter again. Being shoved once obviously wasn't enough for him. If you aren't prepared to enforce your own boundaries and those of your relationship then your boyfriend is going to feel compelled to work overtime doing it for you. Until he eventually gets fed up and ditches you for a more loyal girlfriend.You're going to have to decide what you want more; your boyfriend or the flattering attention of other men.
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A
female
reader, Rebeccaa  +, writes (19 December 2011):
 You are not alone! My boyfriend is exactly the same, if one of his friends did that he would most likley do the same. I think your boyfriend did react a little extreme however Josh is pushing it to far, and he seems like he might be doing it to push your boyfriend and wind him up (i dont know) or he might just not have realised what he did.
I have a friend like that who tried to flirt with my boyfriend and we had a massive row over it, but we then made up my boyfriend absolutley hates her, but i dont think she realises that he does, she always trys to test me by putting kisses to him on messages she even admitted she did that to test me and see what i would do, so just be careful.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2011): Um I don't think he went far enough, his friend was way out of line!! I mean when he called u sexy u shuld have taken it as a warning sign ansd avoided him. I can't believe u don't see it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2011): His reactions were a bit extreme, but I can see how he would be angry-his friend is trying to make out with you, it's a line his mate should not cross.
He probably does have some jealousy issues as you say he even fusses if guys look at you, he should really take it as a compliment because he is the guy you chose to be with.
If he becomes violent/aggressive with jealousy again or you see it building up let him calm down because then would not be a good time to try and get him to see sense. When he is calmer though tell him that the way he gets angry and has also hit someone in the past worries you quite a lot and you would really like him to try and control his reaction. Tell him that no matter how many guys look at you, he is the one you are with so he doesn't have to make a comment or get jealous. You need to tell him anyway as he may not realise just how jealous he gets and once you mention it he might be more conscious of how he is acting and try to control it. Just bring it up like "there is something I have been worrying about, you seem to get angry about people looking at me and it makes me really upset that you think I would even be interested in them because you are the person I love/want to be with..." He might have had issues in a previous relationship and just needs more reassurance than most people.
If things don't improve just go steady, sometimes a jealous partner can turn into a controlling one and before you know it he is trying to run your life. Be watchful of this scenerio, if you think it might be heading that way ever then that is the time to end a relationship. If he is willing to work on his jealousy then that is great but should he try to control you then the safest and best option is to let him face his demons alone. A relationship should be fun and you should both get something positive out of it. You aren't ever there to change someone's ways or fix them, they have to be able to do that themselves.
Best of luck x
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A
female
reader, Mariab +, writes (19 December 2011):
 Josh went to far hunny! How could he run up to hug his friends gf and tell her she looks sexy...then proceed to kiss her!!! And this gf SMILES??? You need to take this seriously ... if you are enjoying the attention that Josh is giving you then its cool...but don't wonder why your bf is jealous as a result of it! Its not fair! xx
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