Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionTried calling. Got son to leave a message - no reply today.... maybe he'll call tomorrow. He knows our son get upset. Its his son birthday on Wednesday he probably wont remember but I thought I would use it to talk plus we are off to Cyprus for the weekend....without him (Work!)
I will keep you posted.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks Steve SI still cant build up courgage. I am going to get my son to call him today and see where it goes from that.LOL
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks Griffo
These are the questions I want answered as well.
I will feed back. Planning on calling him today.
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male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (18 January 2009):
 Im now interested to know a little more about why he can't spend christmas' with you? why???
Does he have other family? Does he have any past experiences? and why is he not intmate especially since April?
These are questions you need answerd from him and the truth.
What ever you do don't worry too much. its only Christmas and New Year so please be strong, you can do it :)
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female
reader, pastfirst  +, writes (18 January 2009):
 I think you should call him.
There's definately a communication problem here.
You expect him to be able to read your mind. Arrange to get together for a talk.
Make the situation clear. Neither of you seems to know what the other wants.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for your responses. The reason for the coldness is that we have not been intimate since April. I hinted to him that I needed a kiss and a cuddle and he asked me had I been drinking. I felt highly offended.
I am mixed race, fairly attractive and in good shape. Too independent with my own houses and car.
I dont know what the matter is. He makes me feel as if he is embarassed of me and has hardly introduced me to family or friends.
Christmas and New Year has always been the same - I can only recall one year where he made an effort. Years previously he would go away without telling me. The year after my last child was born that Xmas I dropped into a seriously bad depression and all xmas I cried and cried. I was ready to top myself as I could not understand why xmas was so painful. That year I asked him what shall we do for xmas and he did not answer and that was the year he went away. One year he came around at nearly midnight and brought presents for the kids. Many years I have bought him things and returned them because we did not see him.
Due to the depression period, I never want to go through that again - it was awful! As a result I am wary of planning things with him.
Now that I have added than maybe you can see why I find it hard to phone him.
It is as if leave her at christmas and lets pick up in the new year until the next xmas - leave her again.
Have you any further comments.
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male
reader, Griffo +, writes (18 January 2009):
Its already been way to long! Communication is the key to all relationships and if you leave it for too long it has a high potential of completely destroying it.
The chasing game (in this instance: cutting of communication causes him to chase you) only really works in the pre stages of a relationship or if you both mutually "agree" to have a break for a while. You're well into your relationship with him now, and this would likely make him feel less needed and give him the impression you do not want to be with him anymore especially through chrissy and new year. You may have left it far too long already. I hope he's the type of bloke thats a bit quiet/patient and just waiting for you to call him - rather than looking else where for love (usually after a month or so).
Yes, Id call him now!
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female
reader, PunkyPippi +, writes (18 January 2009):
 I know you want a male perspective, but maybe you can just clarify a couple of things---
Who broke contact? Why? He seems ready to talk, so I would give him a call and see what's going on.
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anonymous
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