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Lost and Confused about love and marriage. Someone please HELP!

Tagged as: Big Questions, Marriage problems<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (28 May 2008) 2 Answers - (Newest, 28 May 2008)
A female United States age 36-40, *ickaname writes:

I've been friends with this guy for about 5 years. He has been in love with me since the beginning. He lives in India, and I'm in America. I like him, but I'm not in love with him. He's lower than middle class, but planning on doing his MBA. He plans to get a job after he's done with college. As far as personality goes, he's funny, caring, and has a clean heart, but he can't speak english very well. Since we're in different countries, I feel like we won't understand eachother's way of life. He want's to marry me once in a few years. Should I settle for him and think of this as an arranged marriage,....or should I wait and marry someone else? What would you look for in a guy? What are the more important things and qualities in a marriage?

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A female reader, x..BabyGirl..x United Kingdom +, writes (28 May 2008):

x..BabyGirl..x agony auntIt's not an arranged marriage, as that would've been arranged by your parents and you wouldn't have had a choice about it. If you don't love him, don't marry him, it's simple, be honest with him though. Being from such countries with such a large distance between, you don't really know if he is who he says he is.

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A female reader, Tremor Australia +, writes (28 May 2008):

Tremor agony auntI have always held that the person you marry should be someone you love, trust, respect and care for - and they should feel the same way about you in return.

A nice personality and a college degree is all very well, but it's no reason to run off to the chapel.

If you don't love him, don't marry him. It's not worth it.

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