A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ok, so I finally left my adorable alcholic boyfriend. I am mourning because I love him with all my heart but I cannot compete with his other love and the non stop cycle of binges. He knows he has a problem, we talk about it alot, it unavoidable. However I have now come to a cross roads and I am not happy to continue this type of relationship now and the only way we would work is if he got sober and proper help. I don't think he is ready to change, and may never change, but I know that by being with him and opening my arms to him after the next binge is only allowing him to continue drinking and have me also. Please don't think that for one minute I think I can change him or give me a hard time for me being stupid for falling in love with him. I didn't know the extent of his addiction until I had fallen for him.It's been 10 days since I saw him and it's taking alot to not contact him but I know I have to concentrate on me and not him. It's his birthday on Friday - I have every right to not send him a happy birthday message don't I ? I want to get on with my life, I don't want to just end up back with him on his terms again,I deserve a happy future.Rock bottom? I don't know how much lower he can get, he is living now in a caravan as no one will let him live with them, and too right too, and he lets his contractor down constantly. He says he knows its all his own fault.I should be jumping up and down, ecstatic that he is no longer my problem, and running away as far as possible.I miss him terribly. I have been with him 2 years. Don't worry I havent bought any children into this world. Do I just move on?
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2011): thanks you.. I am the orginal poster, I have removed him from all my social network sites and deleted all his messages :-(
I know you are right, he has to want to change.
I'm yet another thing is his life he has now lost.
Still hurts like hell. We get on so well, we are meant to be together, but thats the sober side. I dont know him when he is the other him.
A
male
reader, mobs  +, writes (20 April 2011):
yeah you should move on. you cant help who you fall for but if you say he has to choose and he doesnt go for help then you dezerve better. its simple as that and you dont have to contact him at any time. 2years is a long time to be supportive and you have every right to give up and take a shot at happiness.
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