A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hoping someone can help with a little advice. I have been married for almost 2 years now. We have no children and this is both our first marriage. I truly married the perfect person but I want out. There is no other person on the side or even an interest. I just prefer my freedom over a marriage. I know anyone would kill to be in my position(married to a beautiful woman who thinks the world of me) Is it possible that marriage is just not for me. I dont plan on ever having children so really what is the point of getting married? I am trying to stay true to myself and I feel like I am living a lie. If I stay in this relationship I will be living her life. Any advice would be great. Thanks Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2010): I suggest getting some professional help, such as talk to a counselor about this. It's possible that this could just be a phase you're going through and you could be making a huge mistake that you'll regret later. It might not be that marriage is not for you, rather perhaps you're not ready for marriage. Take things slow and talk to a counselor.
A
male
reader, Red Green 0289  +, writes (16 April 2010):
WOW, your going to stomp on the heart of the woman who loves you that much... nice...
Odds are good if you run from this you'll end up regretting it, and badly. She'll move on, remarry and live a good life, you'll be single, age and then realize that 40 and single sucks, and 99% of the available women have kids (and ex-husbands), and a good percentage of them are damaged from past relationships...
Why don't you work really hard at saving this relationship, a councilor is far cheaper than a divorce.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2010): You cant stay with someone just because u want to spare their feelings. Trust me sooner or later your real feelings will surface and she will probably find out in a very upsetting way. Probably better to be honest and do it now before kids come along! Then u really r stuck. She will be hurt but she will get over u and prob meet someone who really wants to be in a marriage with her. Good luck
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A
female
reader, devastated2010 +, writes (16 April 2010):
Well the first question I will ask you is....why did you marry her in the first place? if being true to you is most important (which should be to everyone) and feel that having your freedom was an issue then why? does she want children in the future with you and is she aware of your feelings right now? do you each have time apart to do things as well as together? maybe you should discuss things and good luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2010): It's sad that you got married before you were ready, especially to someone you think is so perfect for you, because she probably feels the same way. Were you pressured into this at all at any point? Or was it just a mutual decision that changed with time? I wish I could give you advice. I've never been married (I'm only 21), but I am dating a guy that I feel is my soulmate. He's told me time and time again that he feels the same. If he were to marry me and then two years later leave me because he wanted his "freedom", I would be heartbroken. Absolutely devastated. Think about her as well, please. Her feelings do matter.
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