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*r_jb14
writes: I a 20 years old and have a 4 year old son and a daughter on the way on the 25th of July. I am in a relationship with a 25 year old and we've been together 2 years. I love him to death and will give him the world if I could, but half the time I feel he doesn't care about me or my feelings or anything I do for him. As a matter of fact and it really hurts and when I try to talk to him he just gets mad and says that I'm just young so how can I get him to listen and to care becuase he pushes me away and I don't want to get to the point to where he pushes me so far away that I'm not going to want to be with him any more because I really love him. So please help me cause I don't know what to do anymore. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2005): Sounds like he is a bit young for the responsibility of a family. This may not always be true, but right now, he is being a bit irresposible himself, creating babies with a girl he considers "too young" (aka an excuse) but not stepping up to the plate himself. I sincerely hope that when he took a look at the little baby he helped create, he grows up a lot. A lot of guys are very responsible at 25, and some are not.
Wishing you all the best.
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reader, NordicBeauty +, writes (6 July 2005):
It's a known fact that women mature faster than men.Actually, when a man is 25, he is as mature as a 20 year female !When he opens his big mouth & says stupid things such as,"you are too young "Tell that arrogant know-it-all young man,"if I'm old enough to have a baby, I'm old enough to have an opinion, but if you're not intelligent enough to listen to what I have to say or care about my feelings, then YOU are the one who is TOO YOUNG & immature !"That ought to shut his trap...for awhile !When you feel attacked & criticized...speak up !Your baby is coming into the world soon, and you will discover a mother's protective instinct is like a Bear !So, if you can protect your child, protect yourself too.Demand respect from your partner.If you expect nothing...you'll get nothing.All the best.
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reader, Christie +, writes (3 July 2005):
You need to tell him hgow much he is hurting you and that he needs to treat you as an equal, or the relationship will end, its not healthy for him to be so patranising. take care
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reader, becky05 +, writes (3 July 2005):
He sounds irresponsible and also sounds that he is too young for a relationship. Ask him how he feels NOW! tell him youre scared about when the baby comes and youll need more support as you have been feeling insecure lately. If he loves you, he'll listen
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reader, Helen05 +, writes (3 July 2005):
So he has been with you for two years, you are a mother and he impregnated you but he still says you are too young to understand relationship issues? PLEASE! Is seems your partner is avoiding intimacy and using the only excuse he can think of. he seems to be highly immature and is projecting this on to you.This man belittles you, he does not appreciate you and he is practicallly telling you to leave him. Next time he tries to tell you you are too young tell him what you are. You are a strong woman who has brought a life into this world. You are a mother and there is nothing else that brings more responsibility. That is not immaturity. Assert yourself and you may gain some respect. If you do not, prepare yourself for a life of always bowing down, always being the one to say sorry and always feeling that you havent really been listened to. And a life looking after one more child than you bargained for!It may have been a big age gap when you were five and he was ten, but it isn't anymore. Trust me, if you weren't younger it would be something else.
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