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Is she really that busy?

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Question - (5 November 2009) 3 Answers - (Newest, 6 November 2009)
A male Estonia age 41-50, *ike1973 writes:

I have been exchanging emails with this girl. She has written twice that she is sorry it took couple of days to reply to my email, but she first mistakingly thought that she had replied me and only later realized she hadn't.

Do you think it's possible to really think you have replied, but haven't? For me it would be impossible. I always know things like that.

We are actually trying to set up a date (which has got cancelled too times because of my daughter having a cold). She is single and I am married + I have a lovely daughter. The plan is to take my kid to see her dog, check out her new apartment (because I took some photos that are now decorating her walls) and just talk about life. I would love to know her better, but I am not planning to have an affair.

I think she might be somehow unsure about our relationship and where it might go, so she is taking her time to think things through before replying me. Then again, maybe she simply would like to cancel the whole thing, but she is too polite? (she seems to be quite busy and we have had some trouble finding dates that are ok for her, but we still have found the dates in the end and she seems to be replying with positive attitude).

What do you think? Can she really think she replied? If not, should I pick up some message I am completely missing here?

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A male reader, Mike1973 Estonia +, writes (6 November 2009):

Mike1973 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks everyone! You are very observant :-) I admit she is cute and seems like interesting person (we hardly know each other). You might even say I have a crush on her. It still doesn't mean I would have an affair!

Anyway, she has probably noticed something and this may also explain her behavior (if she thinks I would cheat my wife).

My view is that we really can't control who we like, but we can control our behavior. Knowing her a little better would help me see her as simply another human being (and not "just a crush"). Already her explanation about the emails is making my crush disappear, which is good.

BTW: My wife compared me to guys in "There's Something About Mary" :-) (She trusts me. We have been talking about the whole thing.)

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A female reader, pinktopaz United States +, writes (5 November 2009):

Yes, my friend is that way. However, you really expect any of us to believe that you just want to "know her better" and that you're not planning on having an affair? Riiiight. Maybe she is blowing you off and is too nice because she would prefer a man who ISN'T MARRIED!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2009):

As a 34-year old woman I think the following could be the case:

1) She is not interested in meeting you at all (or is not that interested in meeting you) and is only replying after a few days to be polite, hoping you'll get the picture.

2) She likes you, but is hesitant about meeting you because you're married. She probably feels that she might be getting into a lot of problems, so she's taking her time replying. I personally think you're fooling yourself in saying that you're not interested in an affair. If you're already wondering why she's not replying in time, it means you really like her, and once you start to see her it might lead to an affair, even if you say now that it won't. I'm not judging you, but if you don't want to get into a messy situation yourself, decide not to meet her.

3) She's interested, but playing hard to get

I think it's the first option, but since I don't know the exact situation, the other two options could be possible too.

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