A
male
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:basically, long story... I've liked this girl at my school for about a year. She found out ages ago and rejected any interaction with me pretty much. After a while though we have become friends in a sense through this group chat, I tried to get her again but my 'friend' (or he was then) who knew about me liking her went out with her for two months when he knew that I liked her way before he did, but took advantage as I'm awful at talking to girls if I see them as more than a friend. my question, I suppose is, is it worth trying to ask her out as I never really got round to doing it as my old friend took the opportunity and she was told by someone else before hand. Is it worth it as a lot of my friends are now saying 'just ask her, loads of people know you like her so you might as well do it' Please help I am stuck!
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male
reader, Malcontent +, writes (19 June 2014):
I've been in a similar situation before, and the outcomes have invariably been negative. Your attraction to someone becomes public knowledge, and you're stuck in the spotlight until something changes: you ask, she either accepts and you become a couple, or she rejects you and it stinks for a while. Either way, 'everyone' is going to know about it.From my own experiences, I would perhaps suggest just pulling her aside at some point, and just talk to her. Explain how you feel, and gauge her response. It's much better to do that, than to just pop the question of "will you go out with me", and get a curt "yes", or "no."If the feelings are reciprocated, then you know you have a chance, but if not, then a) you know it's not there, and b) you can just keep it between you two, and nobody else has to really know. But I can't guarantee it.All in all, follow the suggestion, and good luck.
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