A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hello. I've recently lost my mother who was the person I loved the most in the whole world. Since she died I've met my fiancé and grew really close to his family, especially his mom: I really love her and I feel her as both a friend and a mother. Do you think it's okay to get so attached to my fiancé's family? Or would it be better to keep things a little cooler in case we broke up in the future. I know I should not think in break-up terms, but bad things do happen and I wouldn't wanna have to go through another loss- aka losing my fiancé's mom after losing my own. Do you think my attachment to this wonderful lady is in some way sick considering I have no real family left? Should I cool things down a little in order not to get hurt in the future should things go wrong in my marriage?
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female
reader, Sweet-thing  +, writes (16 October 2012):
 I see nothing wrong with it as long as she seems mutually attached to you as well. If you later break up, she may still keep in contact with you. God knows, my mother in law still chats regularly with my husband's first wife and loves her to pieces 30 years later. But that being said, I am in the same boat you are. I lost my mother when I was 19, and even though it's been years since I had a connection with someone that even came close to representing that in my life, I do adore my husband's mother and see her as my own. Never hold back on love.
A
female
reader, Gabrielle Stoker  +, writes (16 October 2012):
 It's absolutely fine, darling. Why should you even doubt it? She's going to be your mother-in-law, and if she loves you as your deesrve, it's the least you can do to reciprocate her feelings. Be good to each other and there's no reason you can't build a wonderful relationship.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2012): I'm sorry for your loss. I think it's wonderful you feel that way about his mother & his family, there is nothing wrong with it. Don't worry about "what if".
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