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Is it normal to not feel too much excitement?

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Question - (17 January 2021) 4 Answers - (Newest, 22 January 2021)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Is it normal to not feel too much excitement? I used to feel depressed at home, so I managed to find a good career job. I work 8am-5pm. And I often found wasting my evenings doing nothing so I took on another job. So now I work from 8-5, 6-11. And this repeats for a whole week.

The annoying thing is although I finish work at 11, I will often sit in my car mindlessly browsing my phone as I don’t feel like going inside. Anyway I’m usually tired so I will make my way in to bed before midnight, and repeat 7am.

I started second job As I was let down by close friends so it kept me busy. Now I feel bored with life and struggle to get out of bed most days but I’m grateful for food on my table. So I don’t complain.

Any suggestions? Has anyone felt like this before?

View related questions: depressed

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2021):

You must be so tired having two jobs.That right there can make you down.You need a goal.Something to look forward to.Your goal can be anything.It could be saving for something you really want..a vacation....a computer..New outfit...anything at all.It could even be saving to paint your room and get new bedding.What keeps me sane and happy is houseplants.That's right.If you came to my house you would freak out at all the plants I have.I give a lot away also to my neighbors.I really do not pay for them I use seeds and cuttings.I eat a mango I plant the seed now I have a tree.Do not feel bad about being on your phone before you go in..It is good to unwind.So hobbys are good and things to look forward to is also real good.I think you will be fine once you get yourself something to look forward to.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (21 January 2021):

Honeypie agony auntI agree, most people live boring lives (regardless of what you see on social media).

YOU have to figure out what DOES get YOU exited. And having a hobby or two, making friends, socializing (even if that is limited in these times of the Plague) working out is good too, as it will give you a boost of "feel good" endorphins, dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin. For example, regular exercise can positively impact serotonin levels in your brain. Which can make you OVER ALL feel better and perform better, sleep better etc.

So if you can start a work out regiment. If you enjoy biking then do that, or swimming or running or just doing weights, maybe you find that you like calisthenics or something else. Right now we have snow and ice so not so great for long walks, which means the treadmill and rowing machine get a good work out.

Also the winter time is where a lot of people feel the lack of sunlight. It makes us all a bit more mopey than the rest of the year. There are lamps you can buy that helps with that. And spending LESS time on tech is another thing you can do. It isn't good for us. Read a book. Learn to cook.

YOU are feeling the way you do because you aren't motivated to change it. You think it will just show up at your door ? That isn't how life works.

We can't live exiting lives 24/7 if so, even THAT would become routine thus "old hat".

Life is what you make it.

Lastly, with having 2 jobs, are you saving up for something? Like a house, a vacation, new car ?

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A male reader, JustDad Canada +, writes (21 January 2021):

JustDad agony auntYou’ve convinced yourself there’s nothing going on in your life for you to be too excited about. In all honesty, it sounds as if you may be right. You should be applauded for your work ethic but, damn, you really need to find a hobby or an outside interest of some kind. We only get ONE life. Why waste the precious little time we have by grinding ourselves into the ground? (I’m told we can’t take it with us). You know what you get when you work your fingers to the bone? Boney fingers! Try hearing you every d something you’re passionate about or, at the very least, you rewarding in some way. Become a volunteer of some kind. Join a gym. Get that 1st or 2nd Degree you’ve always wanted. Just find something that you can find a little joy in. There’s nothing wrong with working hard. But I personally spent the last 30 years working 50-60 hours a week and I found myself too stressed, too irritable, too tired and too burned out. I had to find a better balance between work life and personal life. I finally did and I’m happier now than I had been for over the last decade or two, at least. Good luck to you!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2021):

Find yourself a hobby that stimulates the mind, and gets your creative juices flowing. Get away from the news, stop reading hateful rhetoric online, and forget about politics! You have to purge! Put that phone down!

You should exercise! You can do it inside, in your own home! It keeps your body in motion, produces dopamine, and keeps your blood sending oxygen to your brain! Keeping active gives you motivation to do something other than sit around hating and being down about life. Find an exercise app, so you can workout during time-off. It's true what they say about all work and no play!

Your friends have disappointed you, or have let you down. Stuff happens, my friend! You get to choose your friends, and go find new ones! You grieve, let them go, and get-over it! God removed them to free you up for your destiny. Better things are ahead, and you must focus on the positive! The devil loves fear and hopelessness. He feeds on it, because it says God is weak. God is sovereign, the Creator of all things; and doesn't have to perform magic tricks and tap dance for mankind to keep us happy! He will test and refine us! He will bless you when you remember to thank Him and show Him love. Just a thought, in case you do believe in Him. If you don't, find something better.

You are only in your 30's, and you're depressed about life? Covid 19 might restrict our movements and socializing; but it hasn't taken away everything! You still have your sight, hearing, taste, feelings, smell, a soul, and your mind! Be sure to attend to each of these senses and components of your being!

Look, nobody can stop people from seeing nothing but the downside of everything; because it's really a choice. It's not always your circumstances, but how you address challenges you'll face in life; between now and the day you close your eyes the final-time. You may live to be 76, or older, and this may not be the last pandemic and economic-downturn we'll all ever face. Earning money isn't the answer to everything.

You have to be thankful you are alive and healthy; and hopefully, no-one you know or love is on a ventilator or infected. You can spend some of your downtime making self-improvements. Seeking enlightenment through reading, and pursuing spiritual-enlightenment through faith and worship. Thank God (if you believe) for your health and youth! For those who do believe, we find comfort and strength through our faith. We are less prone to hopelessness, or despair; because we know a Higher Being is watching over us. We pray for strength, and care for others. Not just wallow in our self-pity; while we devalue God's gift of life. No matter how pious or faithful you are, yes...we still get depressed and frustrated; but it's a fight to survive! You must fight, fight, fight! To keep your head above water! Don't stop treading water! Lest you'll sink!

You may have a hidden talent you haven't tapped into. You may have one you are neglecting. Use it to create, to give back; rather than seeing life with a spirit of sorrowfulness and depression. Search for light in the darkness. All things are temporary! Change happens consistently, and time continues to pass!

If the feelings of sadness and gloom seem to linger, and to be getting worse; you should see your doctor to determine if you are developing clinical-depression.

Life isn't going to be happy 24/7, and you won't always be jumping for joy every day of your life. Yes, it gets routine, humdrum, or boring; and people will consistently disappoint you throughout a lifetime.

There is this thing that keeps people going called "resilience." It's built-in to our humanity. You have to tap into it, in times like these. You decide you won't give-up or give-in to cynicism, frustration, or hopelessness. After every storm comes sunshine. After every catastrophe, we rebuild! After every heartbreak, we find love again! You press on! Only those who give-up without a fight will lose the battle.

That's the secret to survival, my friend!

God bless you, give you peace, and help you find joy! May He lift the grief left by your friends; and I hope you will not give-up without a fight!

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