A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:dear cupid,is it bad to go to prom alone. I feel like im a failure at life; not one boy from school asked me as his date. how do I keep things positive? looking at allmy friends preparations with dresses,andflowers,and most importantly their dates, I don't even feel like going to prom anymore. ill be alone the whole night. why put myself through the sadness? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (15 July 2013):
I agree with WiseOwl. If you are 13-15 then your "prom" is jr high or middle school and you still have Jr. and Sr Prom from High school.
I know that I would be very upset and sad that I was not invited to prom by a boy (any boy) and I would not go alone but in this day and age lots of girls go alone to things now. IF there are any other girls or guys that are going "stag" (the term for single guys at dances from the 50s and 60s in the last century) you could go as a group.
I would not or could not walk into a room full of couples as a single.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2013): Mummy76, I believe the writer of the post says she "wasn't asked" to go to the prom by any boy. Her friends had prom dates.
She wanted to know if she should still go alone; because she wasn't asked.
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A
female
reader, mummy76  +, writes (14 July 2013):
At this age you should concentrate on having fun, don't put yourself under a lot of pressure. Accept this boy's invitation but make it clear its just as friends, above all you are way too young for a real date. Just see this as a night out and chance to socialise. Enjoy.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 July 2013): If the age given above your post is accurate (13-15); there may be quite a few more proms coming in your future.
It's an unfortunate thing these days of how cruel and mean-spirited very young people can be. So the meek tend to hide in avoidance of bullying and ridicule. You obviously have friends, but how outgoing are you?
So many young girls compare themselves to their friends and shadow those that are more outgoing; but never make themselves standout. I don't want to feel sorry for you, because you didn't plan ahead; and you spent too much time in the shadow of your friends. You have to be noticed to be able to get a date. You can't be too shy to walk up to a boy, and ask either.
Some of your friends got up the nerve to ask boys. They didn't wait. If you don't have a date, you can certainly ask one of your friends if you can tag along. That's pretty much what you do most of the time, isn't it?
You can't be self-conscious and nervous around boys and expect a boy to approach you. You have to be visible and confident. NO, you don't have to go alone. You need to do things that build your confidence and make you noticeable.
Join a drama club, debate team, participate on the school paper, show up at team sports. If you hide and cower away from people, don't expect them to just walk up to you.
There may have been boys wanting to ask, but afraid you'd say no; because everyone knows how shy you may be. let your friends dress you up and show you how to be more noticeable to boys. If you run around all frumpy, you will not get boys to look at you.
Don't whine and feel sorry for yourself, do something about it.
Don't be hard on yourself, my dear. You're too young to be a failure. You're in your awkward years of life. You hate what you see in the mirror. Your body is going through changes, and boys are mean and confusing. This all shall pass.
Do your best to open up to boys. If a boy approaches you with a smile, smile back. Don't withdraw. You have to let people know you are friendly and approachable.
Make your hair look nice, get cute tops, and if your mom allows it; wear a little lip gloss. Do things to be noticed and things will change. Be sweet, but not pretentious. Come out of your shell and allow people to speak to you. Watch your girlfriends and notice how they standout.
You'll outgrow this awkwardness. It may just surprise you someday how you'll blossom into a fantastic young woman.
Sometimes it takes a little longer for some girls than others.
You don't say much about what kind of person you are, so I had to do a lot of guessing.
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