A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My Boyfriend and I have been dating for about 3 weeks now. But it seems as if he's not even my boyfriend, I hardly ever see him at school (Btw I'm 14 I had a bit of an age mix up) and he doesn't hold my hand, or hug me or kiss me or anything. The thing that's bothering me the most is that when he was going out with this other girl, after they had been boyfriend and girlfriend for like a day he would always come to see her and hold her hand and everything. Does He not love me? Is he shy around me for some reason?? It's really annoying me, please give me an explanation!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2008): I think there are three possible reasons as to why he behaves that way:
1.He's a reserved kind of guy who doesn't feel comfortable looking all mushy.
2. He's shy. (like you said)
3. He's plainly not interested.
Since you mentioned how sweet he seemed with that other girl, we can cross out number one on the list.
Try making close contact with him (like holding hands) in private. If he responds, he really likes it after all but just couldn't do it in public. (Thus we have No. 2 possibility)
If he remains stiff, ask him straight out why he isn't comfortable and tell him it kind of bothers you. Guys generally do better with straight questions that just dropping hints. Only he can explain it to you best. If he doesn't positively reply to your concern (like tell you you're being unreasonable or paranoid) despite the fact he knows it's already bothering you, then he seem not to care that much about how you feel. We might get the No. 3 possibility in that case.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2008): i had a bf when i was your age and we were exactly like that, after 3 months i ended it...
depending on why him and his ex broke up he may be more careful with girls now. if your confident enough, take his hand and hold it when you're next to each other and see whether he'll hold yours or pull it away. when you see him at school and say hello to him just give him a hug. if that doesnt do anything try to talk to him about it.
i hope this helps (im not great with relationships myself lol).
you can message me at any time if you like.
good luck xx
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