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Is he blowing me off or am I reading too much into it?

Tagged as: Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (6 February 2014) 4 Answers - (Newest, 7 February 2014)
A female United Kingdom age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Ive been on numerous dates and this particular date was amazing. The guy was cute, shy, and funny (he's also busy as an actor, which I dont mind because Im one too!).

After the date he was sweet,he wanted to kiss me but I said not now, he was fine with that with which he replied 'next time then'. In the week we exchanged messages, he made it clear that he fancied me and I made a joke about what was under the hat(long story) and asked if he wanted to meet up again to show me his crazy hair, he replied:

"You might have to wait until I'm back from filming if you can bear it. I leave on saturday but am busy Thursday and Friday. That gonna be ok? I'll keep the hair long so you can see it when I'm back xxx"

Then I replied, "Alrighty, see you when you get back ;) x"

Then he wished me sweet dreams. Its been a week now and no message, should I contact him to find out for sure or just leave it. Please note he's the confident shy guy. What do I do?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2014):

I think he likes you. Well he is not leaving you hanging. He was specific about the time frame he would be busy. Do you know when he will be done with filming? If you know when he will be done, just wait till then and I am sure he will contact you.

Otherwise, shoot him a text. Don't mention seeing him but just say hi or bring up an inside joke. Text him something that will make him smile and remind him how cool you are. Just mention something like an incident or a place or person you both have in common that you both had a laugh about like, "haha I just ran into so and so and xyz happened..." Idk I can't think of anything, but you get the gist? Just something that you find funny, that he'll find funny too that you both have in common. "I just walked by that coffee shop (that we always go to) and such and such funny thing happened."

Just keep it light. By doing this it lets him know that you are out and about, you are busy doing your thing, but you still think of him and care enough to share with him things you find funny/entertaining. Its a good way to develop intimacy.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2014):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thank you for your answers. I've sent him a message about how it's going etc and if he doesn't reply in reasonable time or hasn't got a valid excuse, it's on to the next one.

I'm usually good about being swift but this guy was different but hey theres more fish in the sea.

Thanks x

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (6 February 2014):

Honeypie agony auntIf you are REALLY interested, I see nothing wrong in sending a message (make it short and sweet) Hi, how did it go? still got the long hair? (or whatever it is about the hair lol)

If he gets back to you fairly fast (if he is indeed DONE filming and online) I would guess it as he is interested.

I do know some people tend to focus 100% on whatever project they work on and forget people around them - and he kind of already "warned" you that he wouldn't see you (and perhaps he also meant talk?) while he was away?

And I think you will do wisely to wait getting physical til you are communicating more often (and I don't just mean through text).

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2014):

Yes, I remember your post from a few days ago...

Did this guy say where he would be filming? If it's somewhere fairly remote then he might not have such good internet or mobile phone reception (which could be why he's not been in touch)or he simply could have been very busy.

Did he say when he was going to be back? If he did, you will just have to sit tight until that date to see if he's as good as his word. If he's due back on Saturday, you'll need to wait until Sunday to see if he'll contact you because that's what he said he'd do.

If you don't hear from him within a couple of days of his expected return then he probably isn't interested.

You say the guy is shy. If you seriously think shyness might be holding him back then you could send him a message the day after his expected return saying words along the lines of "Hi, How was your trip? Hope the filming went well" and see what he says. If he doesn't reply - he's not into you. If he replies but ultimately makes no reference to you two going out again - then he's not that into you.

So if he's not due back yet, you'll just have to wait and see.

Unfortunately, it happens with dating - we feel a spark and a connection with somebody but it turns out that that feeling was one-sided

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