A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I am suffering from chronic bouts of depression and dont know how to get out of them. I'v been with my partner, now my husband for 2.5 years. He is great. But his ex is a lot younger than me and i am so jealous. Jealous of all they did together. They were married for 12 years when she ran off with someone else, left the kids to him. There youngest lives with us and visits his mum once a week, usually for the weekend. my husband and her rarely have contact but he refers to her every day in most things that we do. She was tall and slim and very athletic, i'm the opposite. I hate her. We will never live together as a family as they were. We are both now in our fifties and well past having kids. My daughter live with us and she hates the situation, hates him and his son and the whole set up. I feel really down as i am writing this, but dont know how to get out of it please help someone out there.
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female
reader, Tigerlily  +, writes (8 October 2007):
I think you should talk to your husband. Does he realize he mentions her as much as he does and that it really effects you in this negative way? If she ran off on him after 12 years of marriage, he was probably deeply hurt. I know from my own past experience, that you can be over the person, but not over the hurt. It sounds like he may have unresolved issues that are effecting your marriage and he may not even be aware that he mentions her as much as he does. I'm sure he feels she has done enough damage and would never want her to hurt you as well.
It sounds like the both of you could use counseling. Depression can really affect your life, and it's okay to go get some help for it. You don't want to keep living this way.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2007): Hunny,
Life is to short for these feelings of jealousy, And to actually hate someone for no fault of her own is the very thing I believe is making you so ill, If you think about this as it is you are angry and jealous of your husbands past this is eating you up inside so much negative energy going on in your head everyday it will get to you.
Hun you need to see someone to talk about your confidence and start loving yourself for you, Stop looking at his ex and thinking how wonderfull she is and hating her for it sweetheart, And start looking at yourself and think how wonderfull you are, Depression will get the better of you unless you fight back dont let these feelings get the better of you your worth more than that.
PLEASE TAKE CARE LOVE MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2007): If you keep harping on what you are not you will never move foward and will never be happy. I am sure he still has feelings for her but you need to be more concerened with what you have to offer because I am sure you have some things better than she ever did.
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