A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi everyone, well i'm new to the forum but i have 2 questions.i'll start off giving a little history. i'm talking to this girl (lesbian relationship) and she broke up with her ex to be with me (long distance relationship for now) but after talking more and more with her i find out that before me she's sexually (given oral sex) with about 13 girls. this bothers me a little bit because i'm the same age as her and i've only been with 1 girl. i'm very picky about why i have sex meaning i dont just sleep around and i think this is what bothers me that she had this kind of past.anyway, since it was in the past should i just let it go and not let it get to me? second question is, she says she feels bad for breaking up with her ex. she tells me she has no sexual feelings for the ex and i do trust that completely, but what i dont like is that when i call her she'll go outside because she doesnt want her ex to hear (yes she's still living with the ex due to financial reasons) her ex will know she's talking to me and that her an i are a talking as a couple but i just dont like how the girl i'm talking to is so concerned about how her ex will feel. i mean shouldnt she openly talk to me no matter what or am i being selfish?i'd greatly appreciate to hear your comments, suggestions and advice on all this to help me put things in better perspective. thanks in advance to all :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the responses. I did talk to her about it the other day and she said it was just casual sex that she had which is fine. I understand there was no meaning in it, and I will no longer look to the past cuz that will just be torture for myself.
she is a great girl and is treating me right. the only last thing that kind of bothers me a bit is that
she says she has such strong feelings for me that she is scared i'm going to break her heart so she has a little wall up. we talked about it and i told her that i wouldn't and i'd give her time to trust me on that.(she's been hurt alot in the past)
did i say the right thing?
thanks everyone like i said i've only had 1 relationship before so this one is very new to me. thanks again for all the help :)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2009): You lick one girl and all the rest will be the same. Who cares about her past just get on with things and let it be. If you are going to keep bringing up the past then the relationship is not going to work.If I were living with my ex I wouldn't want them to her my conversations either I mean it is none of their business anyway. If your so worried about things she is doing sit down and talk with her or get her to move in with you if possible. Enjoy her company and don't judge or question her past it's done and gone.
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