A
female
age
36-40,
*tellar25
writes:I've been with my bf for six months and we've had this on going issue with him smoking. When we first started going out he said that he was going to cut back and he says that he has but I still think that he smokes a lot. Another issue we've had is that when we first started going out I had just broken up with my bf of two years. I needed a lot of time to get over him and deal with not being with my ex anymore. My bf and I went on a break because of these two issues and I regretfully hooked up with my ex and now feel like a slut. I don't know what to do I want things to work out but my ex wants me back
View related questions:
a break, my ex, smokes Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008): Hi Stella, "Slut" is a word I hate, it's a word used to put down some women and make them feel small. Please reconsider the volcabulary you use, and remove this word from use...... Anyway, on to your problem.
Your boyfriend smokes, this you knew when you met him. You've only known for six months and already your trying to change him. I realise your worried about his health, he's trying to cut down to please you, this is good, but it's body, his rights and his choices. It's alright to tell somebody you dislike something, but it's really his problem. People change when they want to and when they're ready, you can't push them or force them to, this is not fair, especially as it seems your already out the door.
You should finish the relationship with your current boyfriend. You don't like his habits, (his smoking) your not over your ex, you've already broken up and it's only been 6months. Now you find yourself "hooking up" with your ex again and cheating behind his back. Finish this relationship, this guy deserves better than a girl who is love with somebody else. He deserves better than to be the guy you use to keep your ex away, so please let him go. You don't love this guy, you love your ex, your using this guy. This is not fair. Please finish your relationship with your boyfriend and sort things out with your ex. Good luck, take care.
A
male
reader, PeterPan +, writes (3 July 2008):
 Considering that you've rekindled a relationship with your first boyfriend and you're having issues with the second one, it seems like you might consider staying with the first one... I suppose it's a question of which one makes you happiest...
One last thing: before getting deeply involved with the old boyfriend, you might want to think about the reasons why you broke up in the first place. Have the issues behind why you broke up been resolved?
...............................
|
