A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I feel extremely frustrated and I completely lack confidence. I am a 23 year old guy and I am completely inexperienced with dating and relationships (I mean so inexperienced that I've never even kissed a girl). I find that for the last 2-3 years now I have had absolutely no confidence when it comes to approaching women and getting dates (I have been on only one date in 18 months and she asked me out). It's come to the point where I just expect every girl to reject me so I don't even try anymore. The weird thing is that other than my lack of dating success I can't find anything else that would make me feel not confident. I'm a smart guy, reasonably good looking, in shape, have a good amount of friends, and do a lot of stuff that I like and that make me happy. Anyone who's ever seen me play basketball or football would never think I was timid or not confident, why is it that I can't be confident around women? And what can I improve in my life to make me confident around women?The fact is that I'm happy with everything in my life right now except this. I know some people will say you'll meet someone when you least expect it, but that's just it, I don't meet any girls, I rarely ever even talk to girls. And I'm not happy being single so please don't tell me that I should be.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2011): Perhaps you could start by saying hi and smile at every woman you see, in normal everyday situations. i.e. a lady walking her dog, the girl at the checkout, a nextdoor neighbour.
Maybe start with women that you're not attracted to so that you get used to saying hi to them and gradually you'll feel more confident. Then you could work your way up to small conversations with these females and as you become confident, chatting to girls will become more natural to you.
Hope this helps! Good Luck.
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