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age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I am feeling replaced.So my best friend became friends with this other girl that I don't like but I thought well its not a big deal...yeah I think I've been replaced by this girl.My "best friend" said a month or so ago that she tells me everything and that she tells me more than the other girl. Now I'm not sure if that's still true because everytime the other girl is around us, they are always talking and its just me by myself basically. My "best friend" gave me and the other girl nicknames but I found out yesterday that the other girl has a new nickname. Am I just thinking to much into something that isn't there? Or what?Any advice is appreciated!
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (4 April 2012):
 More than thinking too much into it, you are thinking about it the wrong way. Friendship is not like a monogamous marriage- it allows space for other people outside the couple, because each person is different and brings different things to your life. E.g., maybe she tells you everything and trusts you with all her secrets, but with the other person she laughs more and feels more carefree . Or viceversa. Maybe you two are more compatible in personality , and another girl may be more intellectually challenging and have more common interests. Or viceversa.
That's not a bad thing. Friendship is not a fortress, or an island. When people count for you and have a place in your heart, they always do, even if they have new things and people and interests come in your life.
It sounds that " best friend " to you means exclusivity and total possess of her time, thought and interest. That would be too suffocating for a couple relationship, imagine for a friendship.
It also sounds that you have put all your emotional eggs in one basket- hers , and that you have made this girl the one and only focus of your social / affective life.
Dangerous. You should try to open up to other people too, enlarge your social circle. Or, you could try to make friends too with the third girl, the one that " you don't like ". Give her a chance, maybe you don't like her precisely because she threatens your official " best friends " status , but who knows that you can't became 3 very compatible best friends.
But even if that does not happen, don't freak out. If your friendship with the firsts girl is solid and genuine, it will stay even if she ALSO gets to know and appreciate other persons.
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