A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I'm feeling a little bored in my relationship. I do love my boyfriend, we've been together 6 months. He's 27 and I'm 25, although I would say he acts older and I act younger - yet we work well and can be mature/immature when needs be!So his friends are all pretty grown up and civilised - no crazy drunken nights out etc, unlike my friends.We're 2 different people in this respect and I do feel a bit stifled, past relationships have always consisted of going out in a group and this relationship isn't like that, and is suffering a little bit for it.My boyfriend is not a bit going out person, he's happy to really just have nights in, go to a restaurant for dinner or go to the cinema. I find all that boring when you do it all the time.How do we fix this, it just doesn't seem to work us going out with each others' friends.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2009): I don't like to party myself, but I don't see people who do as being immature. They just enjoy different scenes and being surrounded by a different group of poeple than I do.
So I think that the conflict here is presonality clashes. You like different social events and I don't think that will ever change for either of you, however this is a very important part of a relationship. The couple must be able to share interests in socializing. otherwise you're likely to get bored and he's likely to get jealous and paranoid.
You may want to reconsider your relationship. Think about how long you think it will really last this way?
If you think it will survive, then are oher thigns you can do. Plan nights together and agree on what to do. Plan a couple of other nights out without each other to do your own thing.
Plan an ocassional thing to do together that you wouldn't normally do, to add a little more excitement.
~sy.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2009): I think compromise is important in a relationship! You both need to give a little.
Maybe you can suggest the two of you going out with your friends once in a while...but be sure to behave yourself if you do. If it turns into a bad experience for him, he will never want to do it again!
If he won't agree to compromise, then maybe he is not the right guy for you...your boredum can be trouble in the future!
Talk to him. Good Luck!
Britt
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