A
male
age
30-35,
*ustfriends
writes:recently I went to a party where I saw some troubling things. I saw some girls and guys that I had respect for do things that really bothered me. I like to have fun and I will drink on occasion but I know where to draw the line. what bothered me at this party was that people who I thought were cool and real actually are so trashy and fake it was pathetic. these 16 year old girls who live privileged lives smoke cigarets and were drinking like crazy, my old friend and his brother were both there and my old friend was being carried out of the club on a stretcher in front of his younger brother who is now ashamed and traumatized. I don't think of these people the same and really don't know what to think, I left the club/party before I got in because it was to trashy and it was pathetic that 15 and 16 year old kids were going to the hospital taking codeine and drinking.The girl that I am trying to become better friends with went with some of her friends and I think she felt the same way about them getting shit faced. I wanted to go mostly because she was there but I ended up staying out of it and it turned out to be a good thing. But I dont like that I missed my first opportunity out side of school to hang out with this girl. I learned a lot that night about who people are and how they can be so fake, but I also learned that do I really want to rely on these people to be my friends probably not. My question is The girl I am trying to become better friends is worth everything to me, I did not see her drink or smoke but for some reason I think she was, I know her friends get crazy but at the same time my friends get crazy and I don't so its possible she doesn't either. Should I just tell her like everything cause she was asking who I saw smoking and stuff and I don't like being a snitch but its there own fault for smoking in front of people who know them and in public. She as well as myself are both athletes but she is amazing at her sports, I saw some of the people she is team mates with smoking and thought do you really want to rely on a person who smokes and drinks all the time to be there for you in a game probably not. I play football and I don't want someone hung over blocking for me when they are not 100%.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2010): Hey bud. First off, Im proud of u for making a good decision in what doesnt feel right. Who cares if everyone else is doing it...if you dont like it, and feel it isnt it good for your perosnal well being then stay away. YOU did just that. The fact this girl hangs around the people she does and that you have reasonably concluded she was drinking, this is a sign for you to stay away. You should be thankful you rec'd this sign cause what if you were in a relationship with her and this happened? Then youd have emotion attached to the situation and youd be even more pissed. You can find a better girl and perhaps some better friends who share your values. They r out there. Stick with sports and keep your head up!PS there are better figures you can quote besides rap artists :)
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reader, justfriends +, writes (14 September 2010):
justfriends is verified as being by the original poster of the question well as an update I am pretty sure this girl I am trying to become better friends with was drinking. I was some pictures and she looked totally out of it. If it was just a little to drink to make the party a little bit more fun than thats fine but there were a lot of drugs in pill form being passed around and it would kind of bother me if she was on ecstasy like a lot of people were. I know its her life and there's and I have done stuff before but I never get sloppy.
anyway like the young jeezy song says "who am I to tell you different"
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