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I was aroused after being punished by my mom. Freaked out by my feelings!

Tagged as: Sex, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (12 September 2010) 9 Answers - (Newest, 1 October 2010)
A female United States age 22-25, anonymous writes:

I'm embarassed and ashamed but I felt aroused after being smacked by my mom.

I got in some trouble at school after being caught lying about why I'd been hadn't been at school.

The associate principle gave me a note to take home to my folks. I knew I was gonna be in big trouble because I'd been warned about what might happen. So I wasn't that suprised when after my moms read the note she strapped my bottom with a belt.

Obviously the strapping hurt but it afterwards it left my bottom feeling hot and tingly for a couple of hours - to the point where I felt aroused and started fantasizing about what had happened. Not about my mom of course, just about getting punished like that. Now I feel dirty and ashamed.

I haven't had sex before but I know what it feels like to be turned on, and I was definitely turned on.

I'm not really sure what to do about it or who to talk to. I obviously can't talk to my mom. And my friends would be weirded out by it I think, it's too embarassing anyway.

I'm just really confused about my feelings and I don't know who to turn to.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2010):

This sounds pretty normal really, like others have said a lot of people are turned on by being spanked. You'll probably enjoy it more as you grow up.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (14 September 2010):

This is why it's inappropriate to spank a child in that manner, and especially a teenager who is going through puberty. I really feel bad for you, because I understand how horrible you must feel.

I was spanked as a teenager and was also 'turned on' by it. I think our hormones are more 'excitable' at that age, because I can't imagine it happening now!

Anyway, I'd always feel awful when the arousal died down.

But the moment I knew I was going to be paddled or strapped or switched for that matter I'd start to tremble with excitment. lol the old 'wait till your father gets home' thing never worked on me!! I'd literally be wetting my pants waiting. lol

Sometimes just being ordered to bendover was enough to make my panties wet. I remember being ordered to grab my ankles once whilst my mom went and got a belt. By the time she got back with it and held it to my butt my knees nearly buckled with the excitment of it all - she just said 'oh stand still girl', I dont think she ever knew what was really going on?!

I never had an orgasm from any of the spankings I got, but for days after I'd be thinking about it. What I'm trying to say, is your not abnormal or anything, in fact I bet it's more common than people would like to admit.

I'm laughing about it now but at the time it was a really big thing for me, so I know what your going through.

The buttocks are a sexual part of the body and an erogenous zone, so that's just what happens, and again, that's why spanking a teenager is totally inappropriate!!

It might be hard, but I think you should talk to your mom. She needs to realize that this is a completely and utterly inappropriate way to punish a 14 year old. And if you actually open up to her about this, maybe she'll listen to you. And maybe you could talk to a counselor too if you're feeling this dirty and ashamed about yourself. And also, if you just can't bring yourself to actually talk to your mom about it, maybe you could write her a letter explaining your feelings, or you could show her this question.

All the best with talking to your moms

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2010):

Sounds like you had a build up of sexual tension and having your bottom smacked gave you something to focus it on. It’s hard for kids your age to be fully in touch with your body and feelings and to know exactly what’s going on. From about 13 to 15 just about most everything that happened to me would lead me to think about sex or boys. I was overwhelming at times and had all kinds of strange experiences.

When I was about 13 or 14 a friend and I got caught out of bounds at school when we supposed to be in lessons. The Principle phoned both our parents and we were sent home. I knew for me that meant a good hiding. Of course I was scared to death but all the way home (and believe me I took the long way) I was thinking about all the different scenarios - was I going to get my legs strapped, or be slippered, had my parents managed to get hold of a dreaded cane? When would it happen, what was it going to feel like, would my mum wait for my dad to do it etc...?

The point is, all this wondering, built up an incredible amount of anticipation, so much so that by the time I got home I was tingling with a mixture of fear, anticipation and what I now know to be sexual excitement. These thoughts and imaginings had aroused me sexually and my nether-regions were on fire, if you know what I mean. So by the time my mum told me to bend over for what was to be the slippering of my life and her shoe came to rest on my bottom, I nearly had an orgasm. At the time I didn’t recognise the feeling for what it (nearly) was, but I now know that’s what happened. Like you I was walloped pretty hard but although my bottom was stinging like it had never been before and I was tearful, I was quivering all over with excitement and my pants were wet. The excitement lasted for a few hours, then I calmed down, and things pretty much returned to normal.

What you’re going through is pretty normal amongst people your age - not dirty or shameful, it’s called puberty and it can come in all kinds of strange forms and at the weirdest of times. Try not to read into it too much or let it shape your thinking around sex. You won’t really know what you like till you’re older. In the mean time, if you enjoy having your bottom strapped then just enjoy it when it happens. But don’t bother to tell your mum you were turned on by your punishment or she’ll probably be the one whose ‘weirded out’ lol

Oh and don’t try to create situations where your mum have to strap you, it would be selfish and not very fair to her (and she might cotton on).

Good luck x x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2010):

Don't confuse an adrenalin rush with a turn on. They can act like the same but are totally two different things. We can get an adrenalin rush for any number of things that make our blood boil and being punished is in the top of those. So you most likely had that and read your symptoms wrong and just imagined you were aroused. Be careful of that or when you do get a guy and they are mean to you, you will have a hard time getting out of their hateful clutches and can get into some really 'beat up' situations from it.

However, if your right and getting your bottom strapped like that left you feeling turned on (which is not usual or dirty) then you’ve got plenty of time to enjoy these things in the future. I wouldn’t deliberately do anything to get strapped by your mom you might find the experience different and a lot more painful a second time. Although, if your desperate to get the sensation again then there’s nothing to stop you from using your own belts/hairbrush/slippers against your own bottom as a form of masturbation – that MIGHT give you the same sensation again, just be careful whatever you do!!

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A female reader, Miamine United Kingdom +, writes (12 September 2010):

Miamine agony auntKeep it to dreams baby.. if you keep acting up to get spanked, your mum will be worried. There is nothing wrong with your desires, but sex is private. If you act on your desires and get in trouble often, your mother may guess what is going on and she'll find it difficult.

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A female reader, Miamine United Kingdom +, writes (12 September 2010):

Miamine agony auntNothing to be ashamed of. Some people get aroused when they are spanked, this is normal, if unfortunate when you are young and in danger of getting spanked.. lol

The thing is, we humans are complicated, we get aroused by tons of stuff, some things aren't even related to sex.

Your not having sex yet, so you don't actually have to do anything about it. If you have dreams or fantasies about being spanked, please don't get upset or feel dirty. You are normal, and your desires are normal.

Sorry to laugh.. but your lucky your not aroused by shoes and feet. Many men find this sexy, and it's impossible to avoid such things, so you can imagine how they feel.

Your all right kid. Society tries to make us scared and embarrassed by sex, that's why we feel ashamed and guilty about things that are totally natural.

When you are older, all you need to do is find a partner who understand. Many couples like spanking and find this makes their marriage and sex life stronger.


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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2010):

Thanks for replying

I feel less weirded out by it all now. I guess it just felt strange to enjoy something that was supposed to be a punishment – I mean I was smacked pretty hard. Perhaps I shouldn’t say anything, but the problem is, part of me wants to get the feeling again and the only way thats gonna happen is if I do something thats gonna make my moms strap me again.

Thats probably not the right thing to do but its how I feel. You guys probably think I’m young and stupid for thinking like that but I just keep thinking about how my bottom felt afterwards, I don’t think I’ve ever been so turned on.

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A female reader, janniepeg Canada + , writes (12 September 2010):

janniepeg agony auntIt's called BDSM. You like being submissive. Pain and passion are two sides of one coin. I had that feeling when I was 6 when I watched something on TV I shouldn't really be watching. You don't have anything to worry about. You are completely normal. Although you feel turned on being strapped, what your mom did was abuse. You can talk to someone about that instead.

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A female reader, LiveAnnLearn Serbia +, writes (12 September 2010):

LiveAnnLearn agony auntWas laughing while I was reading your question but now I can give you an advice:

There are a LOT of different things that might arouse different people sexually and most of them were considered weird, shameful and dirty in "the old days", luckily the societies are changing and more and more of them are starting to accept such things as normal nowadays - being turned on by getting spanked certainly is one of them.

If you ask me there's absolutely no reason to feel dirty and ashamed, you're just maturing and developing sexually as well as physically and psychologically and it's only logical that you'll start noticing all kinds of changes when it comes to things you like in life.

As you get older you might decide to try out some of your fantasies in reality, with whoever you'll be dating then, but for now I see no reason that you talk about it with anyone you know. It's just a part of your developing sexuality but certainly not something that defines you as a person that much that it needs to be shown to the world;)

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