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female
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*razygirlzz
writes: Hi. I just felt terrible now. My close friend is a boy and I'm a girl so when we went together, many other friends will think that we're more than friends. Moreover, They gossiped us as a hot topic. I couldn't stand this. Then I told my friend I would go together with him less than before. He understood and encouraged me to find a new friend. But then, he always refused when I called him to go with me in some time. I'm so sad. It's like he break our friendship up. He didn't talk to me as a close friend anymore. I want to know what's his thoughts about me and our friendship?!! and what should I do? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, charliesgirl +, writes (23 July 2005):
Unfortunately, you have allowed petty gossip to interfere with your friendship with this guy. What is more important, keeping a genuine friendship or your "image" within your group of friends?
Understandably, your friend was hurt by your comments and as a result has stopped contacting you. Perhaps he's worried that if you do start going out in public together that you will reject his friendship again.
You need to be absolutely sure that this isn't the case, and that if you do start going out as friends again you will have the maturity to stop worrying about what other people are thinking about you.
If you are sure, take steps towards a reconciliation. If you cannot speak to him face to face, consider writing him a letter, apologising for your behaviour towards him and reassuring him that you genuinely want his friendship. Unfortunately this is all you can really do at this moment in time, at least you will have taken the first steps towards making amends and acknowledging the consequences of your actions.
All the best
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