Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, ToHereKnowsWhen  +, writes (28 April 2012):
 His idea that you have overreacted to this situation is absurd. You didn't overreact, he did. I think being handled like you were is a deal-breaker.
I am also curious about what was the real trigger of his outburst. If something else upset him and he took it out on you, he could and should have explained that to you. However, what he has done is inexcusable. I am worried about what could potentially happen next. What if he gets upset again?
You said that `if a man laid his hands on me he would only do it once because i would leave him'. I strongly suggest that you live up to that.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI still dnt no wot do to do. i just cant seem to shift the thought of what he did and when i try talk to him about it he brushes me off saying i over reacted and im making it more than it is.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all the advice.his behaviour is a difficult one. its not that he is immature he is not an emotionall person and finds it difficult to show emotion. he has always had a temper and bottled things up before he explodes. We never talk about the things that annoy. he also has problems with the way he thinks one minute he is ok and then he is in a mood the next. we do have wonderful times together but its difficult because i am a very emotional lass.
...............................
A
female
reader, ToHereKnowsWhen +, writes (10 April 2012):
There is surely much more to this than just the cat. You should be seriously be getting over a frustrated guy that reacts like that. I can't see an excuse for it.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2012): Probably best to end this relationship. Its not normal to be having a million heated arguments. That alone is a sign this relationship isn't working. So if you nevertheless stay together its only a matter of time before the relationship gets so bad that it brings out the absolute worst in you or him. Since relationships should bring out the best not worst in people this is a sign that you should end this relationship. Its just not working and it never should have come to this. Now there is no turning back cos once he's laid hands on you and you're still sticking around you have both set a new precedent or a new 'low' for both of yourselves. Given that you weren't able to resolve your earlier conflicts leading to this its practically impossible that you will be able to deal with this now. You need to finally end this relationship. And take your cat with you cos he might harm the cat.
...............................
A
male
reader, Love-Wisely  +, writes (10 April 2012):
 People snap much more easily when:
1) They are hungry.
2) They are sleepy.
3) They are sick.
4) They are horny.
5) They are jealous.
Any person, including women and children, can eventually lash out if they feel trapped or starved. This does NOT excuse verbal or physical abuse. But it's important to be fair, identify weak moments, and avoid irritating each other.
As a side note I adore animals, but have a difficult time sleeping in the same bed with one.
...............................
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (10 April 2012):
 It was a cat and it made him want to hit you. Imagine if it was a baby and you were nursing all day, what would he do to you. Let him have his bed and you move out. If the cat is yours take the cat with you too. There is a reason why some person wrote 100 reasons to get a cat and dump your man. Read that at least you get a little bit of humour when you are feeling stressed by your relationship.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2012): You know- I was very angry with my husband this weekend. We get into bed and he is absolutlt not interested in sex. Two days in a row... Still no sex. So I exploded- told him to go sleep elsewhere and that our sex life is pathetic. It sounds like your boyfriend feels the same- you come into bed without hugging him or showing him affection AFTER rejecting sex that evening. That doesn't sound like a dynamic he's happy with. Why should the bed be 'ours' when you don't even have sex with him? At least nit what he feels is enough. Sounds like this situation is frustrating him and pushing him away.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2012): It is not healthy to be scared of your boyfriend even once, he was behaving in an unreasonable way towards you
I do not want to make excuses for his outburst but its obvious he was both tired and frustrated Your relationship sounds like its volatile in that you have had 'heated arguments a million times'. He sounds immature to, so you need to explain clearly how frightened you were so he understands what his actions caused.Do it when hes calm and before he gets tired.
As a note, I would not allow any animal to sleep anywhere in my bedroom and would have stopped it in the begining but his reaction to the cat was extreme this particular night.
...............................
A
male
reader, 2nd man +, writes (9 April 2012):
 wow.... just wait it out
...............................
| 
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: