A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend is hanging out a lot with her friends. I am okay with that because she should have her own private time to do what she likes and with the people she wants to.Usually, she goes out for her hobbies. I tried to like what she likes but it ain't working. Instead of giving a fake interest, I would rather let her enjoy her time with those who really are into it.Unfortunately, things go wrong. She doesn't tell me but from her friends, I knew she met another guy. They said my girlfriend and him are so close as if they are couple.We are still in relationship but it is no longer the same. She used to get all excited telling me about her day. Now, I can't see her interest in talking to me. I tried not to call her for days, usually she will find me but not this time. When we are on phone, she tends to be in a hurry. When talking online, it is even worse.Now she plays the push and pull. I feel like I am her part time boyfriend.It has been 2 months. I am miserable here. I wanted to ask her but I am afraid of the answer. Yet, at the same time, I am hoping she will clear my doubts.What should I do? Could it be they are just friends nothing more than that? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2008): She is a worm. Why would she go behind your back and cheat but still stay with you half-assed and not tell you it's over? That is ridiculous. Just don't even bother breaking it off with her. Just stop calling her..that way you can't be the one who looks bad & broke it off. Although, her friends know she's cheating so I don't see how she could possibly be the one that looks good in this situation. The fact that you didn't call her for days and she didn't bother calling you is a really bad sign. Another is that she has no interest in talking to you and saying that she has nothing to talk about. She's lost interest in you at least but I bet she has met someone else.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2008): Thank you for answers.
I talked to her. She said she has nothing to say. Later, I guess she called that guy, I overheard she said someone is getting jealous about them.
I tried a lot of things so that we can have more quality time. I did ask about her hobby so that she can talk more. Nothing worked because she just has no interest in telling me.
Perhaps her action has given me the answer. I know her well. She always want to look good in every situation. Even when we fight, I am the one blamed no matter who start it. I bet she is waiting for me to end the relationship.
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A
female
reader, Faybelline  +, writes (7 October 2008):
 The only way she can clear your doubts is if you ask her.Yes, the answer you may get might not be what you want to hear but at least you won't be worrying about it and the two of you can talk it through and decide where to go from there.You never know, maybe they are just good friends and she is just happy to have someone she can tlk about her interests to without feeling like she is boring him.If you're really worried about losing her to this other guy, you need to start taking a more active interest in her life, before it's too late. You don't have to be clingy but just let her know you care; surprise her with a romantic dinner or something or even just ask her about her hobbies a bit more and show a little more interest than usual.I hope that you manage to talk to her; don't focus on what could happen, just do it. Good Luck!
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