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I want a woman to dominate me, using her legs!

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (6 January 2011) 9 Answers - (Newest, 12 January 2018)
A male United Kingdom age 26-29, anonymous writes:

Basically I have this extremely powerful desire which is much greater than the desire for intercourse, bjs etc. and it is basically being physically dominated by a woman. By that she overpowers me with her legs - puts me in a body-scissors or head-scissors and squeezes me sensually between her thighs until I submit because of the pressure. It isn't a huge muscular bodybuilder woman I fantasise about but tall, highly feminine looking women with long, highly toned, shapely and sinewy legs from dancing etc. Basically she squeezes me while gently taunting me and pulling my face into her breasts until I eventually ejaculate.

Its a really embarrassing fetish I have had since puberty and I don't know how to deal with it. No one else knows about it that I know. I had a normal childhood and never experienced anything like this which might lead to this fetish that I know of. And outside this situation I have no desire to be dominated at all. I am terrified that if I had a girlfriend (never had one) and she found out she might a) find it a turn-off and leave me b) tell her friends and joke about it or c) lose respect for me and use it as a way to abuse me. I really worry that she woud lose respect for me and see me as less than masculine. Not only that but I don't really want broken ribs or damaged internal organs. It just seems whenever I masturbate I can't think of normal sex in order to get off. I mean I probably could have sex but I can't imagine an even slightly satisfactory life unless this fetish is entertained somehow.

There are lots of mixed wrestling videos all over the internet which almost alway shows some bikini clad and attractive woman squeezing the hell out of a man and it is always shown in a denigrating and humiliating manner towards the man and this is what makes having this fetish all the more painful.

I have entertained seeing escorts (prosititution and seeing them is totally legal here in uk) in order to fulfil my fetish because the desire to be squeezed between a woman's strong thighs is so overwhelming at times it makes me miserable. Its like I get up every day feeling so horny and routinely watch mixed wrestling or read stories pertaining to this fetish in order to get rid of the horniness. Its depressing. Alternatively how should I approach relationships with the intention of involving this fetish in my sex life? How do I find such a relationship for a start?

What do you recommend I do to manage this fetish?

(I hope I haven't rambled - I had to go into detail to make the dynamics of the situation more clear)

View related questions: breasts, ejaculate, escort, horny, no desire, sex life, the internet

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2018):

I don't know if this is the right advice or not, but if I were in your situation I would start by engaging a prostitute & telling her what you want. Or better yet, go to a brothel and tell the 'madam' what you want. When you do, make sure you're well dressed and look respectable -- that way you're more likely to get the kind of 'respectful' treatment you would like!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 September 2012):

My boyfriend and I had never been in a relationship before we met, and when we started out as a couple he told me all about his fetish to be dominated by a woman: Mainly with her legs and such… (he gradually told me more each time when he gathered I wasn’t weirded out) leading to showing me a bit of his porn.

I’ve done my own research in my own time on how to act/what to do and such. And honestly sex has just gotten better! I find myself really liking it too! I’ve learnt what he likes and just when to do it, I’ve even invested in some outfits and such … it’s awesome!

It hasn’t affected our normal sex life at all, in fact if anything it’s made it more exciting. We are total equals outside the bedroom as well, that much is definitely clear. We’re in love and we live together now and our sex life is at it’s best, experimenting more !

Good luck!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2012):

Hey there. I have exactly the same fetish. I can recall from a very young age getting erections from watching boxing matches on TV and staging them with the maid at home (she was much older). Then GLOW came along and I became addicted to it. I also declined taking part of wrestling in school after I ejaculated twice in my pants while wrestling other boys. I was afraid I'd become gay or something.

By the time I began dating I couldn't get any girl to wrestle me down. I had wrestling fantasies with each of my female mates and it was the only though I could masturbate over.

I also resorted to the internet and while half of the wrestling pages are excessively dominatrix or show ladies more muscular than Rambo, some of them had just what I desired: normal looking ladies wrestling and defeating normal looking guys.

My ideal fetish scenario is to have a lasting wrestling match and be defeated by a KO hold (I love breast smothers, but anyone will do). I have never experienced a real KO, though. I also fantasize about being KOed in a boxing match, but that's less exciting. My matches have been more like fight-struggle-let lady prevail-get pinned-get in a hold-feign KO-get masturbated or fight-struggle-let lady prevail-get pinned-get in a hold-get masturbated while in the hold-feign KO.

As for my relationships: It hasn't affected my sex life, but I almost lost a pair of GFs the moment I told them about the fetish. The dull side is that in order to enjoy it I must be on the losing (and somehow passive) side, which means the lady will not get dick. One gf of mine wasn't happy about me getting the orgasm (or masturbation) and enjoying my feigned KO while she remained excited.

I have yet to find a woman that will enjoy fighting me (without charging my credit card) and will marry me. Us wrestling fetishists can get very lonely. There's Yahoo! groups for wrestling fetishes and they're full of guys harassing the few girls (if they really are) that show up once in a while to tease them.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2011):

Hey, same writer here from earlier...

Yeah, I'm the same way. The physical feeling is great, but it's the psychological factor that is the biggest turn-on. Actually being trapped between her legs and not being able to do anything about it no matter how hard I try to pry her legs apart. It's not so much the humiliation, but the feeling of totally putting yourself in the mercy and trust of another person.

My girlfriend was not really familiar with scissor holds before we started dating, but now she loves it, and it really makes it great that she enjoys it too. Her legs are like pythons now and she's really quick so I don't always expect it.

I'd be happy to answer any more questions if you have any. I was in a similar predicament as you before I met her, unsure of how I would integrate my fantasy with reality, but it's worked out wonderfully!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2011):

No, it doesn't interfere with the sex life at all. In fact, it makes it even better I would say for both of us.

I'm 6'2 and about 205 pounds and my girlfriend is 5'5 and around 150 pounds. But she's in very good shape and has very long, strong legs for her height. They're much stronger now than say 6 months ago.

No, she never hurts me, but she could easily with her headscissor move. Impossible to escape, so I have to tap out. I can't escape her bodyscissor hold like I used to...and she can't make me tap out of that, but man, she can squeeze really tight! I think as she gets stronger, she probably will be able to. I hope so anyway!

Neither of us are dominant in the relationship though. So while she likes to tease me about being trapped between her legs, we're total equals when not playing around.

I'm a very lucky guy.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2011):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks people and especially to the male reader who is in such a relationship as I am looking for. It is wonderful that your relationship is otherwise normal and loving. This is what I want - I want her to respect me at the end of the day.

But I would like to clarify a few things. Your ordinary sex life is normal i.e. your scissors fetish doesn't damage your having normal sex?

Also what is the size, height difference between you? Can she seriously hurt you with her moves or can you just not escape?

As a side note I have to be honest when I say the humiliation aspect is a large part of why it turns me on -the feeling of being overpowered and unable to escape - not just the physical feeling. This is what makes it troublesome

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2011):

Wow, we're a lot alike. It's a very rare fetish, but a very fun one too. I've been dating my girlfriend for nearly 6 months now and she very frequently dominates me with her legs either while playing around or during sex. I introduced my interest gradually...first by frequently complimenting her legs, and then asking to see how strong her legs were by seeing if I could escape from a bodyscissor hold.

When we became sexually involved, I told her it was a big turn-on to use her legs like that, and she did and still does so happily. She's very aware of my strong attraction to her legs, and has even gone out of her way to tone and strengthen her thigh muscles. When we started dating, I could easily escape a scissor hold, but now she has toned her muscles so much that it's impossible to escape her bodyscissors, let alone headscissors.

We have a very healthy and loving relationship, and the my unique fetish (I don't even consider it that) only adds more spice to it.

I wouldn't trouble yourself too much. When you start dating a girl in the future and progress further on in the relationship, bring it up gradually like I did. Not all at once. If it's a solid relationship, you'll both be attentive to each others wants, desires and fetishes.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2011):

My boyfriend loves dominated sex. He loves being tied up, teased, spanked. Whatever. He brought it into our relationship about a month after we had first had sex.

At first i was a little hesitant; not because i thought it was stupid; but because i felt a little self concious as to whether i was doing it right.

7 months later and i love doing it; he even does the same to me sometimes!

We use it as kind of 'treat' sex. So its not our regular sex but do it every now and then for a kinky change.

Some women may be put off, but i for one love pleasing my boyfriend whatever his fantasies. Hopefully you can find a woman who is comfortable with it and does the same :)

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A female reader, petina1 United Kingdom +, writes (6 January 2011):

petina1 agony auntFinding a good woman who loves you will be a start then you can over time experiment with her. Otherwise if you can't go down that route then you may have to look for this type of service via internet for special services. I'm sure there's other people out there with similar stories but you are brave enough to share y ours. You need to get out a bit more into the real world as well as living in a fantasy could also mean that y ou have something in your life that you arent happy about. Try to address these issues and build your self esteem up by joining a club or doing an outside activity. Good Luck!

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