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female
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anonymous
writes:From what I've read on the net I believe I have depression.. I know I need help but Im scared and my parents wont let me go or do anything without them and I dont want to tell them because I find it extremely hard to open up and we dont get on. I finished school about 3 weeks ago and I've known this teacher for 8 years. He's helped me out alot and he went through depression himself and Ive briefly in very little detail have told him how Ive been feeling before I left, I think he knows I have it. Problem is I've left school but Im feeling a whole lot worse than I was when I spoke to him but oddly he is the only person I can trust, the one person I can open up to but I dont see him anymore. I want to get past this but I cant because I feel my parents are a barrier and he is the only hope I have. I want to speak to him and I can email him but sometimes he hasnt responded to my emails before. How do I know he will now and be willing to listen and help?
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2008): I understand totally why your not telling your parents.
And a lot of people, including my teacher, told me to tell my parents.
Everything I said before stands. He understands you and its usually people who have experienced and understand what you've been through that can advise you better.
You need to talk to him, so email him. He gave you that for a reason he wouldn't have given it to you if he didn't want to help you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe suffered depression in the past not now...You say talk to my family, but we don't have a good relationship, we hardly talk to each other and they hardly ever listen to me..I cant open up to them, as much as I'd like I just can't...He's the only person who has helped me throughout everything else and for some odd reason he's listened to me and has helped me to briefly talk about how I'm feeling..I've told him about my physical/sexual abuse which I haven't spoken about to anyone including my parents but him. He is the only person who knows what I went through. Thats why I find it hard to trust and open up but he's the one person I can talk to.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2008): Tell your parents they can help you the best. You'll be glad you did. I suffer from depression too and know how your feeling. Your biggest support comes from family. Trust me and get help
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2008): Thank you Gecko12...I will email him and tell him and ask him...I did though email him last week after a huge argument with my parents and I told him I wanted to run away but where could I go, I explained I only had £250 and that in my culture respect/the whole shame thing is everything. I told him I wanted to run away and that if I did I wouldnt be able to go back to my family unlike him. He emailed back saying I shouldnt run away and break relations, and that if it was possible to go away e.g. uni without breaking relations...But how have you coped/got help if you dont mind me askin...
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2008): He's not my teacher, he dont teach. He's the school's network manager who at my time in school I used to get on well with...I briefly opened upto him as he has done with me. He's shared his upbringing and depression experience with me and only me. So what did that mean? I know what your saying but he's the only one I can open up to.
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2008): Exactly the same position I was in.
I understand totally where you are coming from.
This time last year my teacher gave me her mobile number. To be fair, if I actually did what she said it would've helped but I couldn't do it because of my parents being restraining. This was, seek consuelling. As well as the fact I was too scared to even though she persistently said that she would go with me.
She also ignored some of my texts to. Well, read them but didn't feel oblieged to reply to them.
I think you should email him. There are no guarantees he will help you. He has no magic wand. But he will try I promise you that. Talk to him, ask him questions about what you should do and I bet he'll reply. He probably didn't reply because emails have to stop somewhere and if they ask no question or have no purpose he'll just stop replying to them.
As I said, you need to at least try. Explain your parents issue if you haven't already. If you don't try and you don't follow what he says then you'll never get better and end up like me...
Although I actually liked the teacher so...that made mine slightly difficult when talking to her...
As I said, you need to be strong. It is a hell of a lot easier me sitting here saying this than you going away and doing it. Just email him. Don't pester him otherwise he will ignore you.
If all else fails, go confidentially. I don't know how old you are but I'm sure you can. If you need support, talk to a trustworthy friend.
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2008): No offence but your teacher isnt a social worker.
My dad is a teacher and says its very difficult because u want to help these kids but it can be seen in a very different light.
If you understand what im saying. him emailing you back in a completely innocent way can be reflected on him as something totally different due to the fact that u were his pupil.
Its very difficult for someone in his position to help you on a personal level. even if he wants to.
my advice- go to someone else
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