A
female
age
41-50,
*ilu
writes:Hello,My husband went to strip clubs before we met. He has a group of friends that are often go. After he met me he didn't hang out with them for a while, and now recently he started going out with one of them again. He said they are just going to grab something to eat. And he told me his friend asked if he wanted to go to a strip club tonight. He told me he said no. I don't know if his being honest is "really" honest or the other way around. It kind of kills me in my heart. I don't really know what is going on in those places. Should I trust him? What should I do? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2011): My second husband was a lying, conniving, sneaky, cheating bastard. One of the methods he used to try to throw me off when he was up to something sneaky was to bring it up and act like he was all innocent in it.If your hubby is treating you exactly the way he always did, I wouldn't worry much. BUT, if he's acting distant, picking fights, getting easily annoyed by you... I would worry.
A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (16 April 2011):
 I doubt he would have told you that his friend asked but he said no if they had gone. He probably wouldn't have said anything about strip clubs if he wanted it to be a secret.
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A
male
reader, mrg123 +, writes (16 April 2011):
 Got to go with Quantum here. You should ask him and you have to accept what he says at face value. All you have to really fuel your suspicion is the fact its one of the same friends. I understand why this would be upsetting and thats why I think it would be right for you to ask but since there is nothing really to suggest he is other than what I mentioned above you really have to take his word for it unless you can come up with a lot more to justify the suspicion he is. Good luck and let us know how it goes.
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A
male
reader, macdubh712 +, writes (16 April 2011):
Well, my first question is, what makes you think he is actually going to strip clubs again? Are there signs or things that don't seem quite right with your husband? Or, do you think it is just paranoia? Now, I ask that because your own words are: "I don't know if his being is "really" honest or the other way around." You doubt his word so by asking about the "paranoia" I am trying to establish if there are indicators that may lead you to believe he is going to strip clubs or if it is that you are just afraid of him going. If your husband said no to his friend about going to a strip club tonight, what would he otherwise be doing? Is this a night that he typically goes out with his buddies? Does he go out a few times a week? I would hope it is only once a week; I don't feel a husband or a wife should be going out with friends a few times a week. I want to help so if you could tell me what causes you to doubt him I could maybe shed some light on this....
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