A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am being driven ever so slightly made by the fact that the girl I like doesn't respond to me messages to her often for several days.Am I just being impatient? We don't know each other that well and have only met a handful of times.I know that even before I started liking her she was like this with replying to things.What can I do to stop myself being SO impatient? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionok, well it is done now. I have asked her...just wait and see now...
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2009): In regards to the original question, I have to say that I'm not the kind of person who answers my emails everday. I check it once a day, in the morning before work and if its a long email that requires a detailed answer, then I wait for the weekend when I have time to answer it.
Now, that said, if its a guy I never really met before (so my feelings for him are neutral), then I pretty much get around to answering it when I get around to it.
My point is don't take it too personally. Clearly you know she doesn't live on the computer all day. And don't get pushy about her response time either. Nothing would turn me off to a guy quicker than when he would "demand" I answer him in his time. I would inform him, in not so subtle language, that I do have a life outside of the computer and emails and that I don't exist just to answer him and if he's going to get this pushy this early and we hadn't even met yet, I could just imagine what a jerk he would be if we did meet. And then I'd block him or just not answer anymore of his emails.
So, just try to be patient and understand that its more thna likely not personal. As you said, it is email, not a text message (which still, some people take a while to respond to those) and when you see she does answer, just be happy. :-)
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A
female
reader, didda123  +, writes (25 February 2009):
 I think maybe the walk and meal just in case she is not an outdoor girl then you are covering all areas. You will be able to have a couple of drinks then and that will help you both to feel a bit more relaxed and get to know each other better x
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell, I was going to ask to either join for a walk, or a walk followed by a meal. I wasn't going to specify dinner, just "meal".
Which of the two (walk/walk + meal) should I suggest?
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A
female
reader, didda123 +, writes (25 February 2009):
Well its only common courtesy really but put a few questions in your emails then she may feel more inclined to answer unless you do get around to asking her out. I hope so.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthinking about it, maybe most of the time I don't make it clear I am excpecting a response to one of my emails. it is just that I personally respond to all emails. not everyone does that I know.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2009): i would get impatient if someone didnt answer for several days too!
people like that are pretty annoying and why do they even do it? playing hard to get and all that stuff is just dumb
i go by the 'if i feel like answering i answer' rule which is much better than 'waiting so i dont seem desperate' or any of that dum stuff
i understand how you feel
one of my guy friends is like that (txting for ages and then suddenly stopping for a few days and taking a few days even weeks to answer back) i used to be really into him... but after about a year i stopped liking him because even though we met up and things he was like that and it annoyed me
and now i have a bf :D that isnt him lol
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A
female
reader, didda123 +, writes (25 February 2009):
Well if you don't someone else might!
It won't hurt i know there is probably a fear of rejection on your part but don't take it to badly if that is the case, you may not be right for her but someone else will love every part of you.
Better to know now than live with the wondering too long.
Just send her a message saying you really like her and was wondering if she would like to go out sometime with you or words to that effect, i'm sure you can do better than me lol.
Good luck anyway and let me know if its good news, i hope so x
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell, we met most recently on sunday. should i ask so soon?
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A
female
reader, didda123 +, writes (25 February 2009):
Whoops i got carried away with the button there i posted my answer twice sorry x
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female
reader, didda123 +, writes (25 February 2009):
My god you don't know how to text, where have you been hiding lol.
Well i had assumed that you were sending messages via your mobile phone but maybe that is the problem do you know if she is online very often. If she is and is not responding well i don't think that goes in your favour, if you see what i mean, she may just be ignoring you and trying to sicken you off by taking ages hoping you may take a hint so to speak.
Anyway mobile or online you can still ask her on a date as i said earlier, then you will definately know how she feels.
Don't take it badly if she isn't keen just move onwards and upwards she was not right for you but the next one may be.
I hope this helps in some way and good luck x
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A
female
reader, didda123 +, writes (25 February 2009):
My god you don't know how to text, where have you been hiding lol.
Well i had assumed that you were sending messages via your mobile phone but maybe that is the problem do you know if she is online very often. If she is and is not responding well i don't think that goes in your favour, if you see what i mean, she may just be ignoring you and trying to sicken you off by taking ages hoping you may take a hint so to speak.
Anyway mobile or online you can still ask her on a date as i said earlier, then you will definately know how she feels.
Don't take it badly if she isn't keen just move onwards and upwards she was not right for you but the next one may be.
I hope this helps in some way and good luck x
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionok I wasn't clear enough.
we only talk online. I don't use my mobile phone, and I don't know how to text...lol
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A
female
reader, didda123 +, writes (24 February 2009):
Are you sure that this girl feels the same way as you do about her because i honestly think that if she did she would make it her business to reply to you immediately i know i would if i really liked someone.
Why don't you ask her on a date when you next text - that is me assuming you haven't already, at least that way you will get to know one way or another exactly how she feels.
Good luck x
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