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I really try to make this relationship work is it really worth it??

Tagged as: Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 October 2006) 3 Answers - (Newest, 22 October 2006)
A female , anonymous writes:

I really dunno y this keep happening to me.i try to make this relationship work , i work really hard i have never ever complained but he never seem to understand me.is it really worth it? if he leaves me i have literally no where to go and he knows it too. what should i do?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2006):

Wow, you have a great quality to bring to a relationship - one that can ensure you have a life-long, happy and successful partnership with someone. Imagine how amazing you would feel if your partner had the same quality? You and your partner would be very happy together.

I think though, to be honest, you are wishing for him to change so that he puts in as much effort as you. You can not change people though; he is the way he is, and not much will change that.

The more you "try" to make it work, the more he will feel you are trying to control him, put him down and criticise him. That is how people feel when they do not associate relationships as positive experiences.

Reading between the lines, I think you need to look at your self-confidence. You say you never ever complain - why? If you're relationship is not working, and he is doing things to make you unhappy, maybe you should complain? You also mention that if he leaves you, you have nowhere to go. This shows an unhealthy reliance on him; you are with him because you believe you have no other alternative. You do. There are always options - find them.

Imagine the kind of relationship you want with a man. If this man does not meet your expectations, then make the necessary changes in your life to end your relationship and work towards finding someone who has the relationship qualities that you want, and need, from someone. Good luck.

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A female reader, DEBS83 United Kingdom +, writes (22 October 2006):

DEBS83 agony auntdont stay with cus you got no were to go wat you need to do is realy think what you want and if you do decide its over you have to tell him as the longer you leave it the worse it will get may be he might let you stay at his till you find somwere or carnt you go crash at a mates or any of your family homes good luck

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A female reader, Katylouise +, writes (22 October 2006):

You cant stay with this guy just cos you have nowhere else to go i know that your scared about not having anywhere to go but you cant keep your feelings inside and hope they will dissapear they wont unless you talk about them. You have to take the risk unfortunately.

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