A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am a lesbian and I have a real difficulty when I meet new girls as I guess my gaydar may not be too great. I often have problems guaging with when a girl is just being friendly or is actually interested. Alot of girls have a habit also of flirting with other girls even though they have no interest. I find it extremely confusing. I do not feel the need to discuss my sexuality with everyone, especially someone I have just met or only known for a little while so alot of these girls act a certain way without me not knowing my sexuality. I also look very "straight" and dont generally hang out in gay crowds. I guess alot of the girls I meet may NOT be on my level, or maybe they ARE or maybe they are just "overly friendly girly girly" or maybe they pretend to flirt with other girls because I know alot of girls get a kick out of it for some bizarre reason I never quite got.........grrrr....see how confusing it is for me!? I have in the past misread instances after knowing girls for good few weeks/months only to realise they arent "that" way. Any tips much appreciated!!!!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2008): Hi,
You don't say how old you are but I guess your quite young and inexperienced ( I don't mean any offence)
I think your worrying about it too much. I'm sure girls who are not interested will just say 'sorry, I'm flattered but I'm straight. No harm done but obviously frustrating for you!
I think your best bet is to be honest and upfront with your sexuality. If you fancy a girl and your getting on well say you fancy her. That way both of you know where you stand.
I'm not gay but have been approached by other woman and I find it flattering, as anyone would to be found attractive,but honesty stops people getting hurt, especially you.
Good luck
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