A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi I really need some advise. I am a female in my 20's and I have never been on top! I was with one boyfriend for several years and this was never a problem as we were very in tune with each others bodies and had great sex anyway. He also said he would have liked me being on top but understood that I felt uncomfortable. Anyway the problem is that now i have never been on top and I am starting dating again I feel really embarrased and worried about sleeping with anyone new as they invariable want the girl on top.I need advise on how to get started and get the 'rythm' and info on what do once on top.All advise appreciated!Please help..... Reply to this Question
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female
reader, femalelabido  +, writes (1 October 2010):
i find it amasing that you havnt tried it! there is nothing to be embarresed about. men love being able to see you in full view enjoying yourself. the female "g" spot is not actually the clitorus as a lot of people think it is actually inside and towards the front. during arousal the body pumps blood to this area like a female erecton to make it larger and easer to stimulate. by sitting on top, it is deeper and more likely to hit this spot because as you move your hips back and forward, it pushes his errection up against it! some handy tips are, as you move back and forwards, push your pelvis DOWNWARDS to achieve greater penetration, take your time. dont just go flat out. go slow and towards climax, start to move faster and faster. u will find this will also make for a great orgasm for hm too. learn how to move so it hits the spot, and be in tune with your body and emotions at the time like focus on how nice it feels inside you, how much your partner is enjoying it, and the power of being a little in controle. having a good pelvic floor is a must as you can use those muscles to squeese around his fallace and make things tighter. yes i love it on top. very much and always have multiple orgasms this way!
(for a fun read check out http://femalelabido.blogspot.com/)
A
female
reader, demi731  +, writes (8 November 2008):
You can always do what my boyfriend and I do, which is me on top leaning forward just rock back and forth a little, and up and down slowly then speed it up a little but not too much, if you get bored or think it's going badly then support your weight on your knees and go up as much as you can and tell him to do some work from under you. it's fun, more stimulating, and he'll like it because it's a challange. ;)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you all for the great advice!
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A
male
reader, Kohjakza  +, writes (15 September 2007):
Well, if you are uncomfortable being on top, think of ot this way. If you want to stay in good shape, the one on top is the one who works the hardest. So in time you will have fine abs and an appreciable weight and he will not. Grab the top girls, you got the power!, and the inflience neccessary!!!
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A
male
reader, Tommy7 +, writes (14 September 2007):
Experimenting is part of the fun of sex. Finding out what works and what does not is part of the deal. It's not a test that you can fail. In fact, the harder you try the better us guys like it.
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A
female
reader, Sweet-thing +, writes (12 September 2007):
 Ever seen a woman ride one of those stationary bulls they used to have in some western bars? (Think of the "Urban Cowboy" movie). It's similar but you don't have to worry about being thrown! Just close your eyes and rock your hips and do whatever feels good to you. Once you get the hang of it, you'll discover that you can orgasm better on top. Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2007): i have to admit i HATE this position so i can see where you are coming from. I find it embarrassing and only do it when i really have to.
like others have said, the trick is to go slow, lean over him, supporting your weight on your hands, because if you sit upright he will probably slip out of you - adding to the embarrassment and awkwardness!! - and just follow your feelings, go with what feels good and what you like and try not to concentrate too much on what hes thinking or if you look like a wannabe porn star lol just focus on how it feels, relax and have fun!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2007): It is something which comes with a little practise, but a good idea is to put him inside you before raising your knees (so the soles of your feet are flat on the bed either side of him. You can place your hands on his chest to keep upright - although this is more of a squatting position, it is very enjoyable for men because they get to see more of you and you can lift up as far as possible and go down quickly, which they like, but it also makes the 'rhythm' alot easier - just straight up and down. I would suggest getting it over and done with as soon as your start sleeping with a man (at the risk of not sounding very romantic!) because otherwise you might build it into a big deal and worry. XX
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2007): All you have to do is move the way that makes it feel good to you. Don't worry about him. He's enjoying it, trust me. If you do this, the "rhythm" will be natural, and you will probably realize that it feels pretty good because you control the movement & penetration. It is the only way I can get off. And guys love it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the answers it erally helps. More welcome - keep em coming!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2007): Anon is right. But you will get your rhythm right one you start off. I will become easy after a while and very enjoyable.
take care
xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2007): i made the mistake, and stayed sat upright.... but NO, this dont work lol!! you need to lean over him!! slowly move back and forth, its not hard and you will soon get used to it!! begin slowly , and move back so he is nearly out of you, b4 you move forward again, this helps you know its working and feels good 2!
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